Save Me

Chapter 47

A sob escapes my lips and the image of the boy that stands before me blurs due to the tears that fill my vision.
"You have got to believe, I never wanted to hurt you. I never lied to you. I didn't play you. Ever. It has been me all along."

"No, it has been me all along!" I scream and feel my throat hurt. "I was with you because I wanted you! I wasn't with you because I wanted to fool everybody or had a plan! You used me Corbyn!"

"I didn't! You have to believe Amelia, I..."

"Why? Why did you use me? For the freaking money? Is that how much I meant to you?"

"No, it wasn't about the..."
"Don't lie to me!" I roar angrily. I can't believe he has the nerve and the audacity to lie in front of my face even now that I finally know the truth. He's pathetic. "Who am I kidding? I was nothing to you! You didn't even like me! I was just someone who used! That's why!"

"I'm in love with you, Amelia!" He shouts as if he can convince me. "Stop doubting that. Everything I said was the truth, if you don't believe me at least believe this!"

"That's the funny thing about liars Corbyn. Once you say one lie, every single of your words is being questioned. And I'll be damned if I EVER believed anything that you say to me! You're such a liar!"

"Can you let me talk and stop assuming things?"

"No, I have got enough of this!" I snap and turn around not wanting to see him. He won and now has the luxury of witnessing how much he hurt me.

"why me?" I ask after a few seconds. "And don't say the lies you told me the other time I asked you" I add remembering the night after the party where I asked him why he chose me. His words made my heart fluttered then yet now is broken by him.

"Would you believe me if I tell you?"

"Tell me!" I cry. I want the honest answer to why I was chosen to be his victim. He shuts his eyes for a few moments and I notice the way his body is tensed and his face is full of agony and pain. I don't care because he did this to himself and I was the collateral damage.

"For the first time I saw you in that room, I wanted you." I roll my eyes shaking my head. If he thinks that sweet-talking to me will get him out of this, he's totally mistaken. "Every day that it was spent with you I felt that I wanted you more and more, I was thinking about you more. I never stuck with a girl. Nobody stood out to me like that and even though you didn't talk, I didn't mind. I was seeing the way you acted with Noah, even with Oliver, and I knew that you weren't just a pretty face. The first time we kissed felt like a drug to me. This is the reason I wasn't letting you go and kept kissing you like that," Images of that night flood my mind but I shut them out. It was nothing but a lie. A massive lie.

"Then I found you with Edward and I lost it. It brought me back with my sister but it wasn't only that. When I saw you under him...The first girl I wanted crazily was with someone else. And you didn't even want it." His voice has become softer painted with a ton of emotions. My pain is somehow transformed into his fragility of words. "That night I felt like it was my responsibility to protect you."

"Really? Is that why a couple of days later you told me to stay away from you! I should have suspected that those were the only true words you said to me!"

"I never lied to you!" He shouts back. "I didn't like it! That was the reason I treated you like that. You were all the time in my head, I was becoming soft on you and I hated it. Everything I was fighting against and considering the other idiots, I found myself doing and feeling all those emotions! I lost my shit, alright? I didn't know what to think, what to do!"

"What about me Corbyn? Did you stop for a second and thought how I would feel to be so humiliated by you? Did you?" Silence covers the air as he doesn't speak.

"Of course you didn't! You are so selfish to consider what I might have felt like!"

"I knew I hurt you and I felt horrible about it," he reasons and I flakily chuckle.

"Sure you did," I spat.

"And then, the court happened," he adds and everything falls into places answering all my questions.

"Oh my God..." I mutter losing my balance until my back hits the wall behind me. "That was the reason you came to me and offered me the rules, isn't it?" I whisper. His eyes locked in mine, his lips don't move and I shut my eyelashes letting more tears fall.

He only wanted me to use me for his advance. It's pretty clear that now. We would have never been anything but a stranger to each other; maybe that was for the best. A few sobs escape my lips and I cover my face with my hands not wanting him to see his utter victory.

I cry loudly not caring that the room feels colder and lonelier. Not caring that my body wiggles and my throat has closed up leaving me an aftertaste of steel in my mouth. My tears fill my cheeks, my hands.

I feel a light touch in my knee and my bones scream from pain. I don't even have the power to move his hand off of me.

"Baby, I swear I never..." He starts but stops. His whisper is low that my sobs cover it easily. "I love you," he mutters. The words, instead of healing my heart and creating fairies in my stomach, they break my soul into pieces. I feel the anger fueling my adrenaline and I find the strength to glance up.

"Don't you dare say those words to me!" I scream and start sliding up in the wall as he stands up. "You never loved me! Because you don't destroy the person that you love!"

I shake my head and shut my eyes. My knees weaken and I place my palms on them to stop my body from collapsing on the hard cold floor.

"Amelia, I swear..."

"How could you do this to me? How? After everything I had to go through you chose me?" I exclaim with nothing but a pain in my voice.

"I was already broken when we met Corbyn!" I say loudly the words I was fighting in and was terrified of admitting them to myself but it's the truth, the one I can't keep on denying. "I was broken! I couldn't speak because I was in such a shock that I couldn't. I needed someone to mend me, to help me put my shattered pieces together!" My voice cracks and tears fall down ceaselessly. "And now look at me. I was broken into thousands of pieces and now you have broken me into a million," I sob and while the words leave my lips, I realize my miserable truth. I realize how broken and unfixed I'm. I don't even know who I'm. I'm lost. Hurt. Scared. Alone. Again.