The Weirdest Texts

Conversation with Josh part 3

Soooo this one gets a little...graphic some would say
Anty way Enjoy

Me: My cereal taste burnt
I'm not even joking it really taste burnt
Josh: Why
Me: I probably left it on the stove to long
Josh: Wtf
Me: How else would you make cereal
Josh: Hehehe
Me: I can't read cereal without milk
I don't know why
Josh: Read
Me: Did I fucking stutter
Josh: No, but your eyes did when you tried to read that cereal
Me: Touché fuckboy
Josh: Fuckboy who fucks boys get it right
Me: Ok fuckboy who fucks potatoes
Josh: Ur not wrong
Most boys are potatoes
Me: (Top right pic) Paradox
Josh: Who do is the other madamé
(His user name was madamé Lufifi but he deleted it)
Me: It was the group chat with u me and Colby( you'll find out about Cody later)
Josh: Ohoh
Josh: But why does that one start with C and mine is L
Me: Madamé, Colby
Josh: OML i didnt think of that
Josh: Didn't see the comma
Me: I didn't see the old woman crossing the street when I was driving but you don't see me crying over it
Josh: I see the old woman crying about it
Me: Dead people can't cry
Josh: They cry from their bladders cus you know.
Dead
Me:(Bottom right pic)Bet you $5 I can fit this apple up my asshole
Josh: oh lord
Me: I can't believe you're making me do this josh*grabs lube*
Josh: Plsn no
Me: I thought it would hurt but I guess after all the anal I did there's more room in my ass
Me: I bet you $10 l could fit TWO apples this time
Josh: Omfg staph iy
Me: (Middle left pic)OMG MY ASS ATE THE APPLE
Josh: (Bottom left pic)
Me: Are those teeth?
Josh: Yea
Me: (Top left pic)
(If you can't read it is basically says this chick believes she's pregnant with demons)
Josh: Wtf
Me: This is y u don't masturbate Josh
God will impregnate you with demons
Josh: Omfg
Me: Wat thyme is it
Josh: Thyme for you to buy better spices
Me: (Middle pic)
Josh: No
Me: It's just an airplane :(
Josh: No it isn't
Me: Then wat is it
Josh: No
Me: My shoulder hurts
I probably shouldn't walk around the house so much
Josh: Wtf
Me: Why must you question everything I say
Josh: Because nobody knows what you're saying
Me: Tell that to the bread baking in my vagina
Josh: They can't hear tho
Me: You'll have to crawl up my vagina
Josh: Why would i try if they can't hear
Me: Careful though cause there are things up there that can kill you
Me: So they could hear you idjit
Josh: *is quiet like a mice, joining the hundreds that are already up there
Me: Hundreds? Please I'm not a novice
Me: *is quiet like a MOUSE
Josh: Mice
Josh: Mouses are cuter when you use mice singularly
Me: Speak English please
Me: WTF NOW MY CEREAL TASTE LIKE CHICKEN
Josh: It's the whoremones
Me: It's the 8000 nerves in my clit
Josh: The ones that are infected
Josh: With Mouses
Me: I have more than one clit?
Why wasn't I informed sooner
Josh: You prolly grew thousands to fit all them mouses in
Me: Mice
Josh: Mouses
Me: Mooses
Me: OMG JOSH I JUST LOOKED AT MY UNDERWEAR AND THERES A BIG BLOODY SPOT WHERE THE BUMP POPPED
Josh: Omfg
Josh: I don't want to or need to know this

I'm gonna end it right their cause I can't fit the last pic in so I'll continue this convo in the next chapter

Till then bye *Rides strap on into the sunset*