Losing Love

19

I stay quiet, sobbing uncontrollably.

My dad takes this as a sign to continue, though that was the last thing I wanted.

"It was meant to keep him safe, I never would have imagined he wanted to leave" he tries to defend himself.

"HE WAS 20 YEARS OLD DAD" I breathe in deeply. "YOU FUCKING LET ME BELIEVE THAT MY BOYFRIEND DIED BECAUSE OF ME AND YOU RUINED HIS FUCKING LIFE FOR YOUR OWN SELFISH NEEDS" I scream in pain. "YOU LET ME BLAME MYSELF FOR ALMOST TWO FUCKING YEARS."

"I-I'm sorry I-"

I cut my dad off and turn to my brother.

"you knew?" I ask quietly.

He nods his head slowly, avoiding all eye contact with me.

I shake my head in disbelief, before turning to my mom. She was staring at me with wide blue eyes, tears strolling down her face.

I have nothing to say to her.

I fall to my knees and hold my chest while releasing deafening sobs.

I couldn't believe it.

I blamed myself for nearly two years for Ryder's death and my parents and brother just let me.

He didn't leave me, my family made him leave.

Dominic may have been the one who pulled the trigger but behind that bullet was my family. It was all my family's fault, my fathers fault.

I feel Kyle come closer to me, I lift my hand as a gesture for him to stop.

I hate them.

I hate all of them.

"You're murderers!" I call out, Kyle speaks out in defence. "We kill. But we also protect. We also love and fuck Hope, we all love you so much. There isn't anything that we wouldn't do to protect you. So yes, we may kill, we may be murderers, but we are still the same family that you know us as".

I ignore Kyle's comment, and instead I step forward and look into my dad's grey eyes with pure hatred.

I used to love the fact that my father and I have the same eyes but now I loath his. I used to admire him and look up to him. Now I can't stand him.

I spit out the question I had been wondering from the start.

"Who is Luca's son?"

My voice is full of hatred, anger, and rage. I refuse to let it hold any hurt.

My dad looks to the ground, his eyes still glossy. Kyle has a single tear drop on his cheek.

"Dominic" my dad replies.

My heart drops and I feel butterflies in my stomach at the sound of his name. My body fills with emotion once again.

He's been lying to me this whole time. If not lying, then hiding the truth.

I've had enough of this, I need to get out.

I look around the room quickly, my eyes searching for an escape. Any escape. After missing the door at least three times I finally spot it.

I run towards it clutching my hand near my chest and slam it open.

I run.

I don't know where I'm going, I just know I need to get out of here.

I go through long hallways, I take random turns, left, right, left, right, left, I run up a long case of stairs and burst through a heavy door. Finally I find myself outside. I'm at the roof of the building. It's large and spacious so I keep running, until I slam into something tall and hard.

I bounce back from the impact and look up.

My vision is still cloudy from the tears that remain in my eyes. I see green eyes and brown hair.

Dominic holds a concerned expression.

"Hope" he whispers while stepping towards me and placing his hands on my upper arms gently.

I wanted to run away, I wanted to get away from him but I couldn't.

Anger and hurt builds up inside of me, "YOU LIED TO ME" I scream. He stays silent looking at the ground.

"Did you know?" I finally add.

He lifts his head and gives me a confused expression so I clarify, "about Ryder."

He looks in my eyes while replying, "yes." His voice breaks and he clears his throat.

I begin to burst into painful sobbing once again. I've never felt so weak in my life, everything in my life was a lie.

"I'm sorry Hope, i co-" he apologises sincerely while pulling me towards him, attempting to wrap his arms around me.

His sentence is cut off by a loud bang. Dominic instantly lifts his gun from his waistband and searches around. He spots a man in a different building, a sniper, and shoots at the man. He falls as the bullet collides with his head.

My legs feel weak and I can't hold myself up anymore as I lift my hand up to my chest, I fall to the ground and Dominic snaps around.

Everything feels like it's in slow motion, random memories from throughout my life flash through my mind and time feels still.

He runs over to me and falls on his knees next to me. He lifts my head and cradles me close to him. He shouts my name in pain as the rooftops door bursts open revealing Kyle.

Kyle looks down at me with worry. He hesitates, debating over what to do next, before he runs back through the door and down the stairs hurriedly, while lifting his phone and calling someone.

Dominic looks down at me, tears storming down his face as I blink slowly. I look into his green eyes and find myself getting lost for a moment. Pain spread through my body, but I feel calm.

"P-please don't l-leave me" Dominic stutters through sobs. "I-I need you H-Hope, please d-don't go" his head falls to my lap as the dark red blood spreads across my emerald dress.

He lifts his head back up, and wipes the tears from my face. "I-I love y-you Hope" he hesitates while staring deep into my eyes, "I love-you more-than-anything-please don't-leave-me-I-need you" he begs in between sobs.

I struggle to lift my hand up, but manage. I cup my cold hand around his face and wipe his tears with the pad of my thumb. "I love you too" I whisper with emotion, before my hand falls. My eyes shutter close and I hear Kyle's voice before I feel myself being lifted up. "Stay with me" Kyle whispers in my ear, that's the last thing I hear before I fall into darkness.