I'm not crazy. I'm not. (Joker Fan-Fiction)

Chapter 7

*So sorry for the long wait! This is more or less another filler chapter but I promise MUCHO action will be in the next one. Another update may come sooner than you think...*

“So when are we going to go do this?” Selina inquired, lowering herself onto the couch where I sat, flipping through a tattered paper back book. After another blob of sludge for breakfast, we had all gradually migrated to the recreation room. I’d seen some curious glances shot in our general direction, a gathering of the most notorious villains in Gotham setting even the guards on edge. 

“Tonight, preferably,” I said, trying to decipher what on earth a sepulcher was, as it was used in the books context.

“That soon?” Crane blanched, obviously taken aback at my haste. Joker sat on the outskirts of the group, surprisingly uninvolved for having annoyed me to the brink of insanity. 

“...yeah? Why? Is that a problem?” I asked, finally looking up from the Shakespearean literature, quirking an eyebrow as I did so. 

“Not all of us are genetically engineered freaks,” Joker piped up, wearing his infamous cheshire grin. 

“Unless you want to wait another month for your men to break you out I would keep comments like that to yourself,” I cooed with a sugary sweetness. 

“Well, I-”

“SHUT UP!” The other rogues shouted, silencing the clown. He pouted, which was comically out of place on his features, but remained quiet this time. 

“I was thinking tonight because I want out,” I stated.

“What about your deal?” Bane said, leaning against the far wall. 

“After seeing that breakfast this morning, my deal was declared null and void,” I responded.

“That’s nice and all, but how exactly are we going to break out?” Ivy asked, playing with the fabric that was falling from the couch.

“After lights out, I’ll get the cameras. We’ll have a ten minute window at best before someone comes to check them. I’ll unseal your doors, then you lead you out of the kitchens back entrance. There’s only three cooks - none of which are armed with weapons,” I said, leaning back, only to notice the awed looks of my new acquaintances. 

“You thought of all this, last night?” Harley gasped, mouth agape. 

“After I woke up, actually,” I said, going into no further elaboration. I was used to doing things like this - escape was second nature to me. 

“How are you going to...uh...unseal the doors? Breaking them down is going to make a lot of noise,” Joker said, leaning forward, green hair brushing his shoulders.

“The pass codes,” I replied, in a ‘duh’ voice. 

“Those are locked up tight in Mr.Arkham's office. Only our guards know them,” Nigma said. 

Smiling, I pulled out the pass codes from the back of the book I was reading, earning vicious smiles from the others. 

“I don’t know how or when you got those, but you’re brilliant,” Ivy squealed, red hair bouncing as she did a little victory dance. 

“The things you can do when you’re not caged in at night,” I sighed, placing my hands behind my head. 

“Back to your cells, ladies!” the guard hollered, looking pointedly in our groups direction. 

“Ay, ay Captain!” I shouted back, sending him a mock salute. 

He glared at me for a moment more, before turning and yelling profanities at the other inmates. 

“Well, I’m going to catch up on my beauty sleep before we go,” I said, standing.

“Not like you need sleep anyway,” Selina said, and I just shook my head. 

“I know. I’m already plenty beautiful,” I replied, striking a provocative pose, then walking from the room. As I neared my cell my smile began to falter, the light mood slipping away. 

What the hell was I getting myself into?