Spells and Handcuffs (Remus Lupin)

The Woes

I knocked on the door of the room, hoping to find him there and talk to him.

"I haven't gotten rid of that boggart, Molly." I heard my uncle's voice inside.

"It's me," I said, opening the door. He was lying on the bed, Buckbeak resting his head on one side so that Sirius could run his fingers over his feathers and caress him.

"If I interrupt, I can drop by later," I said, trying to make him smile.

"Come in," he replied, but without emotion.

I closed the door behind me and came to sit next to Sirius on the bed near the fire.

"I want to talk to you." I began and paused on whether to say anything more. "I miss the time when you and I were the only ones in this house, and all we had to do was talk to each other. I miss your condemnatory comments. "

"At least you're busy now, I'm not doing anything. I am locked in this house, to which I have sworn never to return. "

"But now the house is used for a completely different purpose. Imagine how your mother would feel if she found out what was going on here. " (I didn't call her my grandmother because I didn't feel it.)

"At least that. " He sighed.

"Are you happy that Harry wasn't expelled from school?" my voice whispered with a questioning.

He looked at me quizzically. "Of course yes. Why do you ask me such a question? "

"I think somewhere deep down you wanted him to be expelled so he could come and live with you and both be outcasts together."

"That's not true," he tried to defend himself but fell silent at the end of the sentence. "I'm a terrible person, aren't I?" He continued, defeated. "I feel terribly guilty that a part of me was hoping for that. And it was obviously obvious to others. "

"Hardly anyone else noticed," I said. "I just feel your mood better than the others. You're not a terrible person, Sirius. We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are. "

He looked at me sadly. "Sometimes I forget he's not James. And that we are not young and reckless teenagers again. James is gone. As much as Harry looks like him, he's a completely different person. And I say it with good thoughts - he took the good things from both his father and Lily. I want to get my lost years back, but I can't find the right way to be locked in this house. "

"Let Harry follow in his own footsteps. It's good that he's not as reckless as you and his father when you were young. Fate gives you a second chance, Sirius. Don't be his friend. He has. Be his mentor, be his father he never had. James would like that. "

"You're right. And I know it, it's just hard for me to make it closed between four walls. "

"Look, I have an idea in my head that you could help me with."

And I told him about my desire to buy and fix thе old inn.

"You could help me guard it. In general, there are a lot of scums. It would be nice if a huge black dog that could do magic hovered around. "

"Dumbledore won't approve of me hanging out there," Sirius told me, but a flame still came to life in his eyes.

"I've already talked to him."

"What?" Really? "

"Yes. However, I had to share my plan so that we could attract werewolves to our side. I told him I would have to rely on someone to keep my back. And he agreed to be you if you're still careful and hiding. And you come out in human form only as a last resort. And ... "