Girls In Love - A Lesbian Romance Anthology

You May Now Kiss The Bride

Good. Now you can finally stop being a freak, get a proper man and get married and have children.

Good, my mother said. My mother. Good that the love of my life and the reason I lived for was gone. It broke me and I cried for hours. I think my mother initially thought I agreed with her and those tears were for her, but I think she got the idea when I threw her out of our apartment, closed the door in her face and yelled that I never wanted to even hear about her again.

She was not done with me, though. Not by a long shot. Determined to 'save me' or whatever mental gymnastics her twisted mind came up with, she set me up with a dozen of different guys the following months. Each one came to my door thinking I was interested in them, the worst ones thinking I wanted to have sex with them the instant I opened the door.

And one of those guys...One of the men my mother send to see me and lied about my wants and needs. One of them stands at my side now, ready for me to be his bride and a mother to his children. Luke Riley.

The minister drew breath and continued on "Into this holy agreement these two persons come together to be joined."

Luke knocked on my door one Saturday night and when when I opened the door to see who's there, he slammed the door into me and came into my apartment. He smiled and said my mother had told him that I liked authority in my men and that I liked to be taken against my will. I cried and pleaded and begged, but he was sure that was what I wanted - that I was just someone looking to be his bitch and wanted him to humiliate me. That night I had the most painful intimacy I had ever had in my life as he forced his way with me. He hit me and tied me and did everything he wanted. It hurt, both physically and mentally. All I could think was Vivian and the way she touched me and always made sure I was okay with everything and never hurt me. I blanked out and I can't even recall what happened that night if I wanted to - and I don't. I've blocked it out, but it didn't really matter. My mother told him afterwards that I really liked what he did and actually wanted to be with him. He did not believe me when I disputed that and asked, begged and demanded he leave. I am not a large woman, so he could easily overpower me and have his way. And so he did. Days and nights in a row, for weeks or months. He took my key, made one for himself and came and went however he wanted. I collected my courage and informed the police, who laughed and said they won't do anything about domestic disputes if I can't show proof. I told them I don't even know the guy, but somehow he had managed to get his name on my apartment as a tenant beside me and they laughed me out.

For a year or so I stayed at work as much as I could. I slept on the personnel room couch as much as I dared, stayed overtime without pay, took part in everything that allowed me to not be at home. Luke didn't care, since he was using my money left and right, for gambling, for women, for fast cards and booze. I think he had an affair or two also, but I didn't care, every time he wasn't at home was a blissful time for me.

That lasted for that year, and then one day - which was just over half a year ago. I woke up in the morning feeling really ill. Thinking nothing about it, since feeling bad was my default state anyway, I continued my existence and went to work. I was feeling queasy while there too, and I was sent to see the workplace doctor. I was there told news that I was hoping I'd never hear after meeting Luke. I was pregnant for him. I like babies and children and I would've been overjoyed if I could have raised a child with Vivian. But with Luke as the baby's 'father'... no, I couldn't wish that to such a defenseless being. I immediately wanted to get an abortion, but somehow, someway my mother had beaten me and it was written on my medical papers that I was not in sound mind to make such decision by myself and my mother was asked... she was over the moon, this had been her plan from the start after all - to get a grandchild out of me, her only daughter. So, I was denied abortion and I had to keep the child. And my mother and Luke forced me to get married to him, so he 'can properly take care of the both of us after the baby is born'. Luke couldn't take care of his own ass if it came to see him on Friday night. I suspect Luke is only in it for my money and my mother is oblivious to his schemes only because she can only see a husband for me and a grandchild for her.