Some Things Never Change

I forgive you

“Look at you! You look so cute with your wet hair!”, he laughed and kissed her gently.

“I hate you...”, she responded with clenched teeth.

“Aaaaww, I'm sorry, really. But it's still funny.”, he grinned and tightened his grip.

She looked up at him and then started to laugh, too. They were right, it was funny. She wrapped her legs and arms around him and they drifted through the water for awhile.

They spend the rest of the Sunday outside. Swimming in the pool and lying in the garden. She loved the beautiful weather in Arizona.

Her eyes wandered lovingly over the scene. Sara was reading a book, Shadow lay cuddled up between her legs asleep and Lindsey was quietly playing one of his guitars. She couldn't ask for more. And she promised herself to not screw it up again. Never again.

Later at night, Lindsey watched Stevie getting ready for bed. His eyes wandered over her body as she undressed in one corner of the room.

“Stop staring, Linds!”

“Why?”

“I.. I don't like it..”

“I'm sorry. It's hard to take my eyes off you, you know.”

“Always the charmer!”, she laughed and walked over to join him in bed.

He took her into his arms and she lay her head down on his chest.

“This was a beautiful day.”, she sighed happily and placed a kiss on the palm of his hand. He watched her sweetly, still afraid what was going to come as soon as he told her about Kristen. She must had sensed something and looked up to him.

“What is it, Linds?”

“I have to tell you something, Steph. And... I have no idea how you are going to react… and it's freaking me out.”

“Just tell me.”

“Please, don't leave me”, he begged.

“You scare me, Linds! What happened?”, her voice sounded frightened.

“I've been thinking about how to tell you that for two weeks, now.. But..”

“Lindsey, get to the point!”

“When you left me...”

“Yeah...?!”

“I...”

“Lindsey!”

“Well, okay. When you left me, I came to your house for weeks, you remember? Knocking at your door..”

She nodded.

“And usually after staying for hours in front of your house, I drove to a coffee shop. I spent there a lot of time. I had nobody. I was so alone. You know, I'm different than you. I'm not the guy with a bunch of friends..”

“I know.”, she responded, still fearing what was going to come next.

“Well, there was a woman. She came there everyday around the same time as I did.. And one day, she sat down at my table and we started talking. Her name was Kristen.”

Stevie could only imagine where this story was going and she already felt her stomach clenching.

“She became a close friend of mine. I could talk to her, you know.. She listened to me. She was there for me. We spent a lot of time together. I was still grieving for you, I was so...”, he broke off.

“It's okay, Lindsey. Just go on.”

“Well, you remember the night, I came here, two weeks ago? When you finally let me in?”

“Of course, I do.”

“I wanna tell you what happened that night. I think you have no idea why and how I ended up here..”

She sighed heavily, trying to mentally prepare for his story.

“That night, I went out with Kristen. We had met often before but that night was different. I picked her up at her apartment and we went to a restaurant. We ate there and she saw how miserable I was and she wanted to cheer me up, so she took me to a club..”

“A club?! You hate clubs! You're a horrible dancer!”

“I know..”, he responded and remembered that he thought exactly the same thing that night.

“Well, anyway, we got there and she started... Well, she tried to come closer to me. I think she thought she could make me feel better. I couldn't take it, so I went to the bar to get us some drinks. I let her alone for awhile, I just didn't want to be there with her. I was only thinking of you, Steph. It felt so wrong to be there with her...”

He stopped again and looked at Stevie. The look on her face wasn't anything he had ever seen before. It frightened him but he knew he had to go on.

“When I came back to her, we took a cap to her place.”

Stevie gasped.

“Steph, nothing happened. I couldn't do it. We kissed – that's all.”

“You didn't do anything?”, tears were forming in her eyes.

“She tried but I.. I just couldn't do it. I was only thinking about you and.. I pushed her away and went back to my apartment.”

Stevie looked at him. She saw the pain in his eyes. And she knew he was telling her the truth. She nodded slowly to make him go on.

“Well, two hours later, Sara called me.”

“Sara called you?!”

“Yeah..”

“Why?!”

“She told me how miserable you were and that you still loved me and that she was worried about you and... I was feeling the same for you, Steph! She was my wake-up-call! I got in the car and drove to you. You know the rest of the story..”, he ended and sighed nervously.

The story hang heavy in the air between them.

“Please, say something, Steph..”, he pleaded after what felt like eternity and touched carefully her arm.

“You couldn't do it?!”, she asked again and looked at him.

“No, I couldn't, Steph, I couldn't.”, he shook his head.

“I forgive you.”, she said, crawled onto his lap and kissed him, her hands folding around his neck.

“You needed someone. She was there for you. I'm glad someone cared for you.”

“How..?”

“I know you love me, Linds. I know it. And I left you. You were feeling miserable and she wanted to make you feel better.”

“Steph, nothing happened.”

“I know. I trust you. And the fact that you still remained faithful, even though I hurt you so much... Even though, you could have done anything.. It... I love you.”, she said and silent tears were running down her cheeks, now.

“I didn't want to make you cry, Steph”, he whispered and whiped them away with his fingertips.

“I'm glad you told me, Linds. That means a lot to me.”

“Why?”

“It means that you trust me. It means that you believe in me not leaving you again.”

“I'm so sorry, Steph. I love you.”

“It's okay. I love you, too.”