Way of the Wolf: Equilibrium

Chapter 20 ~ Unravelling

"I'm with the pack now, a family that look out for their own. My sister is safe; we're both fed, sheltered and cared for. I don't like to fight, as much as a shock that may be to you, and now I have no need to, so I don't."

He held my gaze with such determination that I found myself simply nodding. Perhaps if I'd have to fight for my life every day, I'd take now joy in the act, even in play.

"Okay. I understand."

"I don't think you do. But that's okay, how could you?" Full lips twitched and suddenly he was creeping back into my space. I watched him carefully, trying to keep my breathing soft and even when my heart was beating a mile a minute with every inch he gained. His nose brushed along my jaw and he inhaled deeply. Goosebumps rose across my skin, reacting to his proximity.

A gentle nudge of his fingers against my hip encouraged me to roll onto my back. I did so slowly, peering up at him curiously as he took in my scent again, a deep inhale of breath. Feather brushes of his skin against mine and my body shifted, then froze when I realised I was trying to get closer to him.

It didn't feel wrong to have Ebbe pressed against me. It should have. Looming over me the way he was, I should have been making a move to get back on top. But all thoughts of showing him I still ranked above him when it was just the two of us fled my thoughts at the shuddering exhale that left him.

The reaction intrigued me, and I waited for him to make some move, unable to react just yet. What new rules was he creating to our games? And could I keep playing when I was still so confused by us.

His fingers scorched where they still lingered on my hip and my eyes took in every inch of him; from the way his breathing quickened to the added spice in his scent. Just as I couldn't resist lifting my hand to cup his cheek, he hung his head.

"It's harder than you might think to pretend to be an Omega, even though I'm content in being so. The truth is, I'm more wild animal than Wulver really, Raeghan. I've spent most of my life in fur. Being in skin feels so wrong to me sometimes. I don't know how to move, or how to act. Reading facial expressions doesn't come easily. I misinterpret actions, body language, and sounds. . ." he trailed off, and though I could no longer see his face, the tension in him told me what he felt. Shame. Embarrassment.

He might have thought I'd think less of him for his struggles but it was possible I maybe even admired him a little. I hadn't realised before that in joining the pack, he had to learn to fit in an entirely new lifestyle with customs he'd never seen before.

I understood now why the pack let Ebbe get away with his occasional loss of control, because I had no doubt Signy and Jakkon, if not the whole pack, knew about his struggles in skin. They weren't ashamed of him.

Gently catching his chin, I tilted his head back up. "You can still learn all of that, just as I'm learning more about being in fur. And if you don't, oh well. You're accepted by the pack for who you are. I accept you. Even when you misinterpret me saying 'go away' for kiss me."

I got a small chuckle from that but it never really reached his eyes. In fact, he was doing his very best to keep his gaze low and that didn't sit well with me.

"Ebbe?"

"You make it so hard for me to remember sometimes, Raeghan."

"Remember what?" I whispered.

His gaze lifted slowly and I felt the way he studied my face as he did. I was shocked by the burning intensity I found in his expression all of a sudden.

"That I have to be more than just the wolf."

"A wolf of the wilds," I teased breathlessly. My hands moved of their own accord, drawn to him in a way I couldn't explain, and loved to hate. Hesitantly, I brushed my fingers over his arm, feeling the strength of him beneath my fingertips.