Two Truths and a Lie

Chapter 16

(6 weeks later)

I would've left a week earlier, but Peggy and Eliza practically begged me to stay. With my little motivation and the thought of leaving my sisters behind made me feel guilt, I decided to stay with one of Peggy's inputs giving me another reason to stay up at night:

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(A week earlier)

"ELIZA I NEED NAMES CAUSE I HAVE A STRONG FEELING YOU ARE HAVING A BOY!" exclaimed Peggy, she took Eliza's hands and squeezed them indefinitely as if she was trying to coerce Eliza to tell her sooner.

"I don't know yet! I usually consult with Alexander first, so you're going to have to wait."

Peggy pouted but proceeded to look at me trying to figure out the gender of my child.

"Angelica...WHY IS FIGURING OUT YOURS SO DIFFICULT!!! It's either boy or girl, but I don't have anything clicking to me!! It's blank."

I chuckled at my sister's misfortune. I was fine either way; I like surprises.

"Hey Angelica remember when you were bleeding too much."

"Wow Peggy its not like I fell off a building or anything 😑"

"Oh right right right. But have a theory—"

Then Eliza chimes in:

"A theory? You're theories aren't usually good and what if you say something wrong."

"Puh-lease. Have I've been wrong before?"

Eliza and I exchange glances as I open my mouth to speak—

"Actually don't answer that."

From there (and I'll paraphrase because it was a long discussion for a point that was a couple of sentences long) Peggy told us her theory was in short:

"...What if you had twins? But killed one and the other one was fine. It could explain the amount of blood you were losing. Even the doctor was shocked to find out that somehow you stayed pregnant."

"So you're saying I murdered one of my children..."

"Yes.

WAIT NO! Not murder but definitely one of them like just, you know, bleh."

Eliza cuts Margarita off and scolds her for being so rude and ignorant to the situation.

"Apologize."

"Eliza I don't think it's necessary. It's okay I'm fin—"

"IT'S NOT FINE!" She turns the Peggy and points towards her then to me; "Now you (Peggy) apologize to her (Angelica)."

Although she mumbles curses and words I couldn't make out, she apologizes for her words with a face expression that seemed remorseful, but was also terrified of Eliza's outburst.

"It's fine little sister. It was just again... a theory. You didn't do anything; no harm no foul."

I couldn't fall asleep for the next seven days because I was contemplating on how that might be true and I killed a child, MY CHILD, because of my selfish wants to leave. (Like I said before: I don't think I can live with myself if I survived, but lost the pregnancy)

DISCLAIMER SUICIDE IS NOT SELFISH BUT PLEASE DONT DO IT CUZ ILL MISS YOU 😪
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But after another 7 days later, I left my childhood home with Eliza as Peggy went the other way, further upstate to get back to her distant, but kind (?) husband; I can't really say...we met him like twice, but just like me, Peggy and her husband eloped.

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"Alexander??" Eliza says as she steps in her house. Without a second thought about their father, Pip and Angie took their youngest brother from their mother's arms and scramble in with giggles filling up the silent house.

"Alexander?"

Still no response.

Although it might seem normal for a person not realizing their name has been called, it was peculiar that Alexander wasn't even at the door waiting for Eliza or at least rushing down the stairs.

"Alexan—"

"I'm sorry I didn't meet you at the door, Betsey! I guess I was so engrossed into my work I couldn't hear my name being called."

Alexander finally came down stairs, but he looks more tense than usual and he didn't have as much energy as he usually does. Like he was doing something for hours.

"That's until I heard screaming children..." (throwing shade towards his own) "then I realized someone was inside the household."

"Alex, you look tired..."

"I'm fine Eliza, just exhausted my plans haven't been listened to that much."

After about 5 minutes of Eliza worrying for her husband's wellbeing, I got tired of standing and decided to head upstairs.

The next boat back to London is when? I guess I have to go to the ports to check it out. UGH!

(The Next Day)

As soon as I wake up, I decide to head straight to the ports. If I'm gonna be 2-4 months pregnant when I get to London, I rather not waste time now before I'm too close to birth. (Boats to London from America take like 2 months oooh history fact)

As I look for a station with schedules someone in the crowd caught my attention. They were familiar and instead of looking for a station
I went and looked for them.

It can't be him right? No that's not even possible why would he be here. It's implausible.

Right?

A few moments later I couldn't see him anymore and decided to just head back to the station.

(4 hours later)

Why. Is. This. Difficult.

I see Alexander around the house, everywhere I go!! And each time I can't help but just think of what we did.

Should I approach him? No it's already too awkward AND EVEN HE DOESNT EVEN KNOW HOW WEIRD IT IS!!

I stare at the clock, wishing that three days would pass with ease; and I can get back on ship to London and head back 'hOmE.' It's not the best place, but it does have less guilt and mixed feelings about your sister's husband there.

I look toward the desk to my left and see my suicide note staring at me with a crumpled face.

"I hate you." I say to the paper. (What?! It's not the weirdest thing I've done in these past days)

You know what! I'm gonna take this paper march downstairs and throw it away or even burn it! YES OF COURSE!

Nobody else besides my siblings and parents know I tried to commit: I believe it should stay that way! It'll be an inside joke in a couple of years; sure they won't find it funny, but it would be hilarious to twist with their minds.

Hopefully if I see Alexander he doesn't notice the note in my hand. If he isn't there fantastic! If he is..I'm retreating back upstairs.

I go the bedroom door, take in a sharp breath and finally go out that door.

No one is downstairs luckily. With that I take a small sigh of relief...then head to the kitchen because I'm thirsty. 🤧

I set the small note on the counter and look towards the cupboards for something—

"Hey Angelica!"

Crap.

"What's this on the counter?"

I tense up and freeze on the spot with a single word being muttered under my breath:

"S**t."

AHHHH I KNOW IM LATE BUT HAPPY NEW YEAR SHDHDUDKFKDHS
UH SEE YOU NEXT TIME AND THANKS FOR 900 views and 14 votes! I didn't know actual people would read it 😅