Burning Up ~*~ [ THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY 2 ] [ FIVE x OC ]

N I N E T E E N

~*~

     Ivy stood next to her Five, still with her hand placed against his back. He kept looking around and itching and sweating and farting and she was just overall concerned for him. 

    "Honey, you look like a mad man," Ivy whispered to him. 

     "Well, Ives, I wonder why," he whispered back. "He's trying to kill me." 

     "I know that. But you can't kill him. Because if you kill him, you cease to exist and so does this timeline maybe. That means we didn't get to have all that juicy drama and fun," Ivy told him. "You just have to make sure he doesn't kill you." 

      "What happened when you went behind the pub earlier?" Five asked. "You were out there for a long time." Ivy looked at him, then shrugged. 

     "T-There was a stray dog. I gave it some dumpster food," she lied to him. 

      "No you didn't," Five responded. 

      "Can we not have this discussion right now?" Ivy asked, looking at Five. "Not the right time or place. The president of the Unite States is about to get assassinated." 

      "R-Right," Five nodded. 

     "This is my favorite part," old Five said. "The calm before the storm." 

      "Look. The briefcase," Five said, pointing at it. 

     "No, don't," Luther said immediately. "You won't be able to get there in time."

     "Of course I will," Five said with too much confidence. "This is our only chance." 

     "Hey, uh, just remind me... what was the final stage of paradox psychosis again?" Luther asked slowly. 

     "Homicidal rage," Five answered with a crazy twinkle in his eyes. 

     "Right. That's great," Luther shrugged. "Five, listen to me. I..." Five spatial jumped but right as he did, so did the other one with the brief case. Five reappeared and stumbled a bit, eyes wide. 

     "No. No!" he called out. He turned around, seeing the other Five holding the brief case and the now put together gun. "Oh... shit." 

     "Bad idea, shit-heel," old Five said. 

     "Stop it! All right?" Luther yelled, grabbing the gun from Old Five's hands. "The both of you. Pull it together." 

     "Now, Kennedy is gonna be coming around that corner any minute," Ivy said, looking between the two. "Okay? So, everyone, let's just take a deep breath..." She breathed in deeply, motioning for both of them to do it. 

     "Now, we're all family here, okay? So can we all just try to get along for a few more minutes?" Luther asked. There was a silence, the two Five's looking at each other. 

     "You want it?" Five asked, looking at his older self. 

     "Go ahead," he responded. 

     "What's that?" Luther asked. Five wound up his leg and then absolutely demolished Luther's testicles. He groaned out in pain, Ivy having to contain a laugh before realizing the two Five's were fighting each other. She had not time to react as it all happened within two seconds. Luther tried to ask them to stop, but they both kicked him again. "Hey! I'm getting really sick of this!" Ivy watched Luther still groan in pain, the two Five's appearing behind her. 

     "Getting tired yet?" old Five asked. 

     "I can do this all day," young Five said, still looking like an absolute maniac.