Training The Ensign

TTE: 23

Chapter Twenty- Three: Frienship

We're now here inside KFC, eating. Kasama ko ang mga senior officer namin noong COCC ako at ang mga senior officer namin noong junior officer ako.

We are occupying two long tables, Lea's sitting on my right side while Mae is on the left. Katapat ko si Jaxtin at katabi niya ang iba pa naming ka-batch habang sina Allistaire ay naroon sa kabilang dulo, malayo sa akin.

Because of the awkward atmosphere, hindi ko magawang tingnan si Jaxtin. I can't even speak properly, mabuti nalang at hindi gaanong madaldal si Lea, si Mae lang ang dumadaldal sa akin paminsan-minsan.

The senior officers during our COCC days were talking loudly. Miss na miss siguro nila ang isa't isa dahil ang iba ay lumipat na noong mag-college. I don't even know if Allistaire changed schools, wala rin akong pakielam.

Nang matapos kaming kumain, nagpasya kaming maghiwalay-hiwalay na. I was kinda thinking of talking to Jaxtin about everything pero hindi ko na siya makita. I decided to text him. Wala namang mangyayari kung palagi akong iiwas. It was my fault after all.

[Me: Hi. Can we talk?]

I waited for him to reply para masabi sa kaniya kung saan kami puwedeng mag-usap. Sinabihan ko rin si kuya kanina na mauna na dahil may kainan pa kami sa CAT.

[Jaxtin: Where?]

[Me: Starbucks. Thank you...]

I felt sad. Dati ay sigawan at hindi awkward ang mga usapan namin. Everything was light. Ngayon wala na kaming pinaguusapan, awkward at galit pa ang isa sa amin.

Nang ma-seen niya ay dumiretso ako sa Starbucks at nag-order ng frappè. I ordered Jaxtin's favorite, too. Maybe it'll serve as compensation to everything I did before.

Naghintay ako ng mga five minutes bago siya dumating. He looked different. Or maybe because the atmosphere was dark and scary. He doesn't look and feel like the old Jaxtin before.

"Hi," bati ko.

Tumango lang siya at umupo na. Ibinigay ko ang frappè na binili ko sa harap niya. He just looked at it.

"Ano 'yung pag-uusapan natin?"

Huminga muna ako ng malalim bago magsalita.

"I know that saying sorry will not justify what I did to you and to our other friends," panimula ko.
"But still, I'm sorry. I am really sorry, Tin. I know I should've told you sooner, bago ako umalis, bago ako nang-iwan. It's my fault. I admit my faults and I am sorry for that."

Mabuti na lang at kaonti lang ang tao sa Starbucks. Nasa pinakadulo rin ako pumuwesto para hindi marinig ang kahit anong pag-uusapan namin ni Jaxtin.

I continued. "When dad took me, forced me to come with him, threatened me and my family, hurt me physically and mentally, nawasak ako, Tin. Matagal na 'kong wasak, e. Noong una palang na iniwan niya kami, noong una palang na sumama siya kay Miradeth. You probably don't know the Daddy issues I have since I never had the chance to tell you and our other friends. Si Nova lang ang nakakaalam no'n dahil kababata ko siya. I was always a daddy's girl so it hurt me a lot when he left us."

I wiped my tears and talked again. "When we first went inside the CAT office, you remember that, right?" I asked. He nodded but he looked confused.

"Allistaire... Sir Gonazaga, I liked him. The first time I saw him I found him interesting. After that, I saw him multiple times at the cafè where ate Kyle works then I found out that he was the owner of that cafè. We had several interactions back then. After those simple interactions, we became friends. Isa rin ang papa niya sa investors ng kompanya kaya mas lalo ko siyang nakilala. Nova knew I was interested in him... pero ang alam niya ay hindi ko seseryosohin ang pagka-gusto ko kay Allistaire."