Training The Ensign

TTE: 22

Chapter Twenty-Two: Last Salute

For the past three years that I was in California, I learned so much and tried to forget the memories that kept on hunting me. Sinubukan kong kalimutan si Allistaire. Ang mga ginawa niya noon bago ako umalis, ang pagiging tanga ko, lahat ng mga bagay na dapat hindi ko ginawa at naramdaman.

I also tried my best to forget the bad memories I had with dad. From the part where he broke his vow to mom, the part where he left us and chose someone else rather than his own family, the part wherein he hurt me, kuya, and mom physically, verbally and mentally.

Pero kahit kailan, sa tatlong taon na iyon, ni minsan ay hindi ko naisip na kalimutan ang mga kaibigan ko.

I can do that, I can forget and make new friends, I can forget the part wherein I hurt them, ngunit hindi ko ginawa. They are the ones who were there for me, they served as my sanctuary, peace and home. Naisip ko na baka konsensya lamang ang pumipigil sa akin para kalimutan sila, but I know that conscience has nothing to do with my love for them.

Before I left the country, I talked with the upper hands of CAT. I talked about me, leaving the organization. It was a hard process, a lot was damaged during that time. Pressure was on, pain was there but they still allowed me to leave or maybe they have no choice at all but to accept the fact that I had to leave.

**

"You're leaving?"

"Sir aye Sir," I answered Sir Villega.

He looked at me with worried eyes. "Why?"

"Sir personal problems, Sir."

"We'll talk about that with Sir Pavilio. File your resignation first."

I nodded and left the office. Pagkatapos nang pag-uusap namin ni Ma'am Poliyo, I decided to talk about my departure. Alam ko namang may relasyon sila Allistaire noon but I didn't know that they are still a thing up until now.

Maybe pride, ego and embarrassment was taking place inside me. I know I don't need to leave just because of Allistaire and dad, but maybe I should to prevent my self from falling apart.

Pumasok ako ng classroom noong umagang 'yon. I took my seat and did the normal things to do. Gusto ko sanang ipaalam sa mga kaibigan ko ang tungkol sa pag-alis ko, I just don't know what's holding me back from telling them.

Jaxtin might know this sooner or later. Parte siya ng CAT at siguradong id-discuss namin ang matter na iyon ng magkakasama. I'll just tell him before that happens.

Pumasok ako ng CAT office bago umuwi para mag-log out. Doon ko naabutan si Allistaire at si Ma'am Poliyo na kausap si Sir Villega.

Shocked that I saw him, I tried my best to avoid eye contact. Ayaw kong makita siya.

"Mendoza," mahinang tawag ni Ma'am Poliyo.

I looked at her and replied, "Ma'am Mendoza, Ma'am."

"Aalis ka?"

"Ma'am aye Ma'am."

"Bakit?" Makahulugan niyang tanong. Maybe she's referring the conversation we had last time.

"Ma'am personal reasons, Ma'am."

I saw Allistaire seriously looking at me through my peripheral vision.

Tumango-tango siya. "Ah... saan ka pupunta?"

"Ma'am out of the country po, Ma'am."

She glanced at Allistaire and dismissed me before making the conversation longer.