Revenge or Revolution?

21.

It was the last year at college. Brian had already passed out of college and Sandra had started to live with him instead of the hostel. It was one such day when Sandra found a pack of cigarette under the bed.

Brian was getting more and more addicted. Sandra frowned upon the whole act of smoking but she always went easy on Brian as he smoked once or twice in a day and he was trying to quit it as much as possible. Sandra had bought him patches and gums for his addiction. Brian even used them but in vain. Seeing a pack of cigarette hidden and below the bed was the limit. She was going to have a talk with him as soon as he came home from his friend's place.

After the relationship crossed the period of one year, Brian had made more friends than he ever had in his entire life. It was completely the opposite for Sandra. She had stopped talking with so many people. Nobody liked Brian and even though Sandra ignored the hatred, she couldn't make people want to talk to her. She had accepted the fact that till she was at the college, those guys who knew Brian would always hold a grudge against him for being with her and the same with girls. It didn't bother her since she was in love with Brian and love really makes a person blind. She was completely oblivious to the fact how Brian felt about her.

Brian entered the house when she was studying.

'Hey,' Brian greeted, 'need any help? Just kidding. If I knew how to solve those complex algebraic equations, I wouldn't be working at a garage.' And Brian snorted which was his way of laughing at his own jokes.

'I wanted to talk to you about something.' Any other day, Sandra was indulging his whims but today she was not in the mood.

'What are you talking about?'

'I found this under your bed.' Sandra said as she placed the cigarette pack on the table.

'So? I smoke. Don't you know?'

'I didn't know you need to hide that from me. You know how much I hate people who smoke. Why would anyone do that to their lungs?'

Brian had suddenly turned aggressive. It was unlike of him. It almost seemed that he wanted to turn this small thing into a huge fight.

'Oh God! Not this again!' Brian shouted. 'A man can't even smoke now? Why are you being so crazy?'

'It's not about smoking. It's about not telling me about it. I thought we were getting over this addiction together.'

'Maybe that's why I didn't tell you. I knew you'd get all judgmental.' Brian clearly seemed irritated now. 'What's your problem with cigarettes anyway? You are obsessed with Cigarettes. It's alright to drink at the local bar when you are upset but it's wrong to smoke if I am stressed?'

'Why are you stressed? You work in a GARAGE. That's like the easiest job in the world. I am the one working my butt off so that I can manage a decent job so that we both can survive.' Sandra felt guilty saying that but it needed to be said. Working in a garage won't help them in the future. And Sandra was already frustrated with the college exams.

'How dare you say that?' Brian was furious. 'At least my father is not a tobacco fiend. Yes. I know why you hate cigars and cigarettes so much. Your father was a chronic smoker and neither you nor your mother could control him. So you need this urge to control me to undo what has been done to him.'

Sandra could not believe what she heard. No one knew, except Brian and Steve that Sandra's father had died of Lung cancer which was a clear result of years of tobacco abuse. She loved him to death but hated his habit and that's why she despised anyone who smoked. She could have saved his father if she was more adamant, if her MOTHER was more strict. She didn't want the same to happen to anyone else and so she tried to stop this heinous addiction for people she cared about. She had told Brian about this in confidence and he had the courage to use it like this.

'I don't care how big of a fight we have. You don't use that against me.' She could hardly hold her tears.

'Yeah, well, you should have stopped irritating the hell out of me day in and day out for something as common as smoking.' Brian didn't even sound guilty for saying that.

Sandra was quiet. She stood up from her chair, tears rolling down the cheeks, walked towards where Brian was standing and tightly slapped him on his cheeks. She walked out of the house without saying another word. She was sobbing and shuddering. She could not believe that a mere argument on cigarettes would lead to something so drastic.

What Brian had said was true. She went to this bar where she drank her standard order of Bloody Mary whenever she was upset. The strong taste of vodka and the spicy tinge of hot pepper made her forget about the worse things in her life. Usually, one drink would suffice her needs but today was different.

She straight up went to the bar which was deserted at this time of the day. There were hardly a few people around. She noticed that Sean was there. She knew Sean because Brian and Sean used to party together. He was a tall guy with a wheatish complexion. His lips had gone dry and thin because of too much partying. He was also very thin which Sandra thought was because of the constant drug use. She knew that Brian had a history of using heroin but he had stopped it when he met Sandra and it clearly showed physically. He was still thin but not as much as he was when she had first met him.

Sandra could clearly see that Sean had been drinking because of his bloodshot eyes. Sandra was sitting there and drinking her cocktail when Sean came towards her.

'Hey, Sandra! Where is Brian?' Sean was staggering. 'Oh, that's a bloody Mary. You must be upset. Did you have a fight with Brian?'

Sandra was more furious than anything. How did Sean know about the bloody Mary? Only Brian knew about it. Had he been spilling her secrets to everyone? Was he trustworthy at all?

She drank the whole peg in one go. And she ordered another one.

'Bartender, wait! We'll have 2 bourbons.' He winked the bartender as he said it.

'I don't want to drink bourbon!'

'You should try this. It'll take the pressure completely off you. One peg and you'll feel like you are on the top of the world.'

Sandra knew that it was useless to resist. Besides, she could use a strong drink which was off her usual course. She was too upset to notice that the bartender who was given the order was not the usual one who worked there.

Two glasses of bourbon arrived and they sat there drinking it. She started to babble about her spoilt relationship with Brian. Sean kept on listening with his hollow eyes staring at her and sipping the drink slowly. Sandra on the other hand, gulped hers down in one go.

'One more of this, please,' Sandra told Bartender and then looked at Sean, 'this is good. I don't know why I never drank it.'

'Should I bring your special Bourbon or the regular one, sir?' bartender asked looking a bit concerned.

'I'd say half of my special one would do.'

'Why is this special?' Sandra asked.

'I just tell them to add a bit of red wine in the mix. It gives it the special taste I like.'

Sandra's other drink arrived when Sean was still sipping his first drink. He didn't want to be drunk for what was going to happen next. He had been waiting for this since the day he had laid his eyes on Sandra.

She gulped the other drink just as fast as it arrived. Her head was feeling dizzy. This had never happened. She hardly had 3 drinks and she knew she could tolerate at least 8 drinks before she felt dizzy. This was unlike her. But who cared. She started babbling on and on to Sean.