Family for the Holidays

Samuels pov

"Alright I've got to go, I'll see you tomorrow Mason"

"Where are you going?"

"He's off to see his girl" Marrybeth cooed causing Jeanie to "awe" while bouncing excitedly, Nathan looking whipped as he watched her in adoration.

"Oh wait up, I want to come" Mason jumped up ready to follow me.

"No way Mase, you stay put" I tried to wave him off but he kept walking with me.

"Please... I love the little tomato, I'm coming."

"Fine but no hugging her I swear." I threatened knowing Mason was one to be a bit too affectionate and flirty.

"Oh come on loosen up," he punched me not so softly in the shoulder, "I bet she gives good hugs." He wasn't wrong when she hugs it's like she's holding on to something special. The first time she hugged me I was worried about her going around hugging everyone like that.

I kept my head on a swivel looking for her, still Mason was the one to spot her.

"Is that her?"

She was sitting against a tree out of the way her long hair was pulled back and it flicked as her head looked around. She frowned as she looked down and her phone. We started walking in her direction when her head popped back up and a breathtaking smile took over her frown. Making me freeze as she jumped up and ran in the opposite direction of us and right into the arms of a guy.

"Who the heck is that?" Mason asked for me

Tattooed arms wrapped around her and spun her in the air. My heart sank to my stomach and I felt sick. A surprising amount of emotion ran through me and I wanted to shut it down rather than deal with it head on.

"Is that one of her brothers?"

"No they don’t have tatted sleeves."

"Probably just a friend, come on let's go ask." Mase tried to push me along but I stepped away.

"No, I don’t want to interrupt."

"Dude let's just go see before jumping to conclusions."

"I'm not jumping to conclusions I just remembered I have somewhere to be." I snapped at him feeling frustrated.

"Liar, you made plans to meet with her. Come on, I can help you scare the guy off."

"No I've got to go." I shook him off me and turned in the opposite direction even though the shortest way to my car would have been passed the two love birds.

I know we were just becoming friends but something inside of me twisted up seeing her like that and I really hated the feeling, so much that I’d rather not deal with it and just try to bury it down deep.

********************

I didn't have work last night but I didn't sleep either Lucy had sent me a text asking about my day and I sat up trying to think of a response that didn’t have any snide remarks about how her day was without me. Now I'm with Mason at our side job working through my issues.

"Man you need to slow down or you'll kill yourself."

Mase and I had been working since early morning I hadn't stopped for a break yet wanting my mind to be consumed by the job at hand instead of overthinking.

"I'm fine." I huffed out lifting another stack of tiles out of the truck.

"We have two days to finish this job keep going like this we'll be done before the day is over."

"How is that a bad thing?"

"Well if we finish today you will have nothing to keep your mind off, whatever it is you are running from, tomorrow.

"I am not running from anything. And if we keep talking we wont finish before the weekend is over.”

Unfortunately Mason was somewhat right and we finished the job by early afternoon the next day. So when I got to my silent apartment and had hours before I had to get to work and I started feeling sick.

I found myself sitting on the couch with the tv turned up failing at distracting me as I stared at my phone screen thumb hovering over her name. If I text her I'll be tempted to ask who she was with on Friday and I may not want the answer. My knee bounced anxiously as I clicked on her name and scrolled through our previous messages. There weren't that many, I wish there were it could keep me busy and maybe I wouldn't miss her so much.

It was ridiculous to miss her at all since we barely knew each other, yet I kept imagining that wide eyed fascinated look she'd get when looking directly into my eyes. That look always gave me an excited feeling in my stomach. Then there was her blush that made me wonder how dark I could make it.

I didn't hear from her until Tuesday, she wanted to meet up and I almost made it to the table she was sitting at before I lost my nerve and went the other way. I was being a coward and started hating myself... my self-hatred turned to annoyance towards her as I wondered why she would make plans with me on Friday when she had other plans. She told me she didn’t have a boyfriend yet my mind wouldn’t stop thinking differently and driving me insane.

Thursday I met my friends and apparently Mason had caught them up on the full situation as Marybeth looked peeved and Parker was glancing between us with a pitying expression.

"You are an idiot." I knew she was just getting started and seriously contemplated making a run for it.

"Beth.. remember we weren't going to attack him, we are just here to listen to him." Jeanie calmly said

"I'm not attacking, I am simply stating a fact. He is an idiot."

"I got to agree with her, dude she had an innocent vibe you can't mess with girls emotions like that they'll close off on you." Parker shook his head disdainfully at me adding to my annoyance.

"Oh my god I'm actually about to agree with Parks, you see what you've done! Parks and I agree!"

"Are you ever going to talk to her again or do you plan to continue ghosting her? Because I'll take her number if you don't want it."

My jaw clenched as I glared at Parker, I wasn't ghosting her I was just trying to figure stuff out.

“I'm not ghosting or playing with anyone’s emotions. I’m just- I’m just taking time to sort myself out, okay?” I let out an exasperated breath before grabbing my things and leaving my friends to pick on somebody else.

Friday morning I didn't get off work until six am and didn't trust myself to wake up if I tried to get a few hours of sleep so instead I cleaned and did some homework I'd been putting off. After school I was nearly falling asleep at the wheel so I stopped at my favorite coffee shop. I stumbled in and placed my order getting a muffin since I felt myself getting hangry. I was about to check out the mystery section in the back when I thought I saw Lucy sitting in a booth with someone wearing the shops apron.

My first emotion when I confirmed it was her was excitement, then guilt and finally irritation. My emotions since last week have been too much to deal with. I've been so careful about who I let in my life and who to trust and get attached to. But when it came to her it all seemed so easy. Which is maybe why it hurt so much when my destructive mind thought maybe she hadn't been so honest with me.

"What are you doing here?" Her eyes widened for a minute before slightly narrowing and her mouth turning down. The expression taking me by surprise since I had never seen it before. She's usually got a resting tight lipped smile except when she was nervous or concentrating on something.

I don't know what answer I expected but I hadn't expected her to be so blunt and honest. I was shocked she would go through the trouble to try and ambush me and a bit amused by her thought process.

The amusement faded quickly as she got up to leave and the guy stood with her offering a hug. I couldn't control my glare or my frustration as jealousy fought its way back to the control. Thankfully she didn't give him her usual hug and seemed uncomfortable by the idea. Then the way she looked at me as she spoke made me feel like an idiot it practically screamed "are you stupid?"

I knew I had messed up, and I shouldn't have approached her when I hadn't been in my right mind and saying things I wouldn't normally just come right out and say. She brushed past me while I tried to process what she had just said. I noticed the guys eyes lingered on her and I did not like what I saw.

Before I made anymore poor decisions I left without my coffee. At least I didn't work tonight.

I don't know why I thought she would text me first but I waited by my phone all morning, by late afternoon I had talked myself up to calling her. I hadn't expected her to answer on the first ring and the way she answered made me feel hopeful. She sounded so relieved but then she admitted to thinking it was her sister which then had me feeling like a piece of crap.

She admitted to her week being awful and I felt guilty that I hadn't been around to cheer her up during whatever was bothering her. I know I need to fix things and I can't do it over the phone. When I ask her to meet up I'm having trouble hiding my desperation. Parker said she was likely to shut me out and thinking about her doing that worried me too much. If she agreed to meet me then it wasn't too late and I still had a chance.

I let her pick a place since I could now never take her back to my favorite coffee shop with that guy working there. She didn't keep me on the phone for long and I was bummed when she said goodbye but I know it's my fault we hadn't spoken for a week so I can't be upset.

Now I just had to count down the hours until I see her.

I was nervous enough as it was but then her brother had to be the one to answer the door, I think it is Nick but I could be wrong.

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to pick up Lucy."

"Why? Where are you going?" I thought Nick had been more relaxed than the other two.

"Just out to eat.."

"And what exactly will you two be doing?"

"Um eating?"

He didn’t like that answer as he crossed his arms and fixed me with a glare.

"You know there are three of us, yes? And you know that if anything... and I mean anything bad happens to our baby sister because of you, you will be answering to us."

If anything bad happens to Lucy because of me? I don't plan on hurting her but then again she sounded upset on the phone could that really have been because of me?

"Understood." I said when I realized he was still waiting on an answer

"Is it? Because I don't know what happened this week but I'm guessing you do. Now that's not going to happen again, correct?"

Thankfully before I had to answer Lucy's soft voice interrupted. She was wearing a bright dress that hugged her waist and showed off her legs. Like always she captured my attention entirely.

Her brother and his threats forgotten I had to hold myself back from crushing her in my arms unsure how she would respond if I tried.

She is a funny and cheerful person, like a ball of sunshine and she had a childish air about her that made me feel like a kid. I hadn't felt that way in a very long time, even as a child I had to be more well behaved. She seemed to find adventure in everything she did.

I had to make things right. I couldn't lose someone like this.

"Yeah, no worries. I probably deserve to wait a bit right?" I half joked hoping her response would let me know where I stood.

"Definitely." unfortunately the sweet playfulness I was used to was vacant from her voice.

"Well uh.. are you ready to go?"

"Where are you going?" I had forgotten about her brother and was actually getting a bit annoyed with him as we had covered this already.

I seemed to be getting annoyed allot lately.

"We are going out to eat, I'll see you later, love you." she was quick to slam the door behind her. "Let's go before they catch me."

Agreeing I remembered to open her door before getting in on my side. "By the way," I made sure to look directly at her hoping to use my eyes to my advantage, was that manipulative? I'm just desperate to be on her good side again. "you look beautiful."

"You're really sucking up aren't you."

Hell yes I am. I think I royally screwed up. But that didn't make my statement less true.

"Thank you for agreeing to come out with me."

"You promised me chocolate crepes" she shrugged sounding so different and I knew it was because she was still unsure of me.

"Ouch am I ranked below those?"

"Duh, its chocolate, not many people rank above that."

Not even that douche you were with...

Knock it off Sam.

"Well then maybe that should be my next mission."

"Good luck with that."

Thanks cupcake, I think I'm going to need it

"I can't be too far below chocolate right?" her expression said it all and it actually hurt me. "Ouch, alright... am I below pie?"

"Yep."

"Rollercoasters?"

"Hmm.. Yes."

"Well even I rate myself below those." I tried to joke but this was honestly worrying me.

Before I got to her door she was climbing out but I made sure to get the restaurant door and order for her. Thinking I could use all the extra points I could get.

"Thanks again for coming out with me."

"Well I uh... I sorta missed seeing you." the knot in my chest loosened a fraction.

"I missed you two cupcake." god her blush was so cute I could feel myself warming up. “So uh, when I didn't show up on Friday.. did you do anything?"

Despite her insistence that she didn't have a boyfriend I still needed to know who the guy I saw her with was. So I was careful how I worded my questions.

"No, um Paul just took me home." my heart sank to my stomach

"Paul?"

"Yeah, Leo and Nick's best friend he drives me home whenever Troy has late classes. I actually wanted to introduce you but... yeah." She frowned and looked away from me.

"I'm sorry." I'm an idiot,

"Its fine, no big loss there Paul is actually pretty annoying" her smile returned and she laughed causing jealousy to twist inside of me "He actually texted me asking for help because some girl, for reasons unknown to me, was trying to get him to go out with her and he wanted me to pretend to actually be happy to see him" she seemed to loosen up as she told the story, "I put on a show to make her go away. You should have seen how terrified he was as she chased him across the quad."

I don't think I have ever felt this type of relief before it felt freeing. She not only seemed more herself but had unknowingly explained away the whole issue.

"Hey uh where would you say I rate against him?" I don't know if I wanted the answer or maybe was pushing my luck.

"Who?" Her brows furrowed before shooting up, she's so expressive. "Paul? Oh you are above him, you aren't even half as annoying as he is." God why did it take me a week to ask her this I hate to think of all the time we missed out on. "I'm not even kidding just last week I lost it on him and Nick had to pull me off of him."

I felt myself crack a smile at the image of her going after the tattooed jerk.

"Wow it's good to know I don't need to worry about you kicking my butt." I was joking however her humor evaporated leaving me worried "I mean... I don't right?"

"Not now." she only smiled because the waitress dropped her food in front of her, still it was a beautiful smile.

"So you've never had feelings for him?"

I don't know why I am torturing myself with questions I might not want the answers to.

"Are we still talking about Paul?" Her face twisted in to something akin to annoyance "feelings like rage and disgust are very common around him." I felt like she was purposefully misunderstanding my question.

"I mean like a crush..." her eyes went wide and her cheeks lit up giving me a disappointing answer "Is that a yes?"

She sighed and put down her fork telling me she was about to get serious considering how excited she was to eat those chocolate crepes.

"Alright but this stays between us and is never brought up again or I swear you will be sorry." she lifted the fork again this time to threaten me "I was fifteen and my uncle had rented a beach house for a few days I blame the dang summer sun, it must have made me delirious because for three days I thought he was perfect" I didn't want to hear this. "Thank god it only lasted that long. To make it up to myself on the way home when we stopped to get gas and he ran in for snacks I told my brothers he was asleep in the back seat and left him at the station. It was only minutes later when he called them that they noticed he wasn't there."

Pure joy engulfed me chasing away the last bit of doubt and dread that had clung to me like a leach all week. It was clear she saw him as nothing more than her brothers friend, that doesn't make me like the guy but at least this gave me a chance.

"That- that is the single greatest thing I've heard all week."

"Alright it's only fair if you share your most embarrassing crush."

"Oh no way!"

She leaned back with a satisfied smile and I was glad she no longer seemed so guarded.

I may have told her that I'd been head over heals for my first crush but I didn't know what that really felt like until this excited girl took my hand dragging across a warehouse before spinning on me with her wide bright eyes and looked into mine like I was special. In that moment I felt the world stop and a part of me flip.

Anything I felt before that moment was fiction and this was reality. And it wasn't just one time it was every time our eyes met it was every time she blushed or smiled or laughed everything she did made me feel this all over again.

And I had almost let it go.

I watched as she cleared her plate and I dreaded the end of this day. To drag things out I got us more coffee and demanded paper and crayons, it was a long shot but she seemed more than happy to sit with me and color. I teased her whenever she got too concentrated on the task and I wanted her attention. When the waitress tried to hint for us to leave I ordered the first thing I saw on the kids menu in front of me.

When the food was gone there was no more putting it off and she announced it was time to go. Her cool hand touched my forehead and she faked a gasp causing an adorable expression. She played along with me no matter what I did. Just like that night at the toy store, I had those stupid foam swords sitting on my kitchen table and every time I saw them this past week was like bitter sweet torture making me remember that night and miss her.

Knowing I wouldn't see her until Tuesday made it harder to say goodbye. At least I wouldn't have any worries about texting her.

AN
Its my birthday. Wanted to get something out might take it down later.