Innocent

chapter 8

How was I going to live without Jesse? He was gone.

My mother took him away from me, and she was going to pay!

I sat up and thought about how she just left me there with Jesse dying.

She wasn't going to get away. I wasn't going to let her run away from this.

No matter where she was, no matter what she did to change her life, she would pay the price for taking away my protector and my brother.

She scarred me for life by killing him.

Tears slipped slowly down my cheeks and I fall back down on the pillows and cried myself to sleep.

I was woken by the lights and the guards yelling.

Nothing had changed. But why would it?

Hailey and I spent the day making bed in the cells.

I didn't say much to her, she tired to tell me stories of her life but I wasn't really in the mood to talk. So I just kept quiet.

We walked into the lunch room, we got in line with the other woman and pushed our trays along, The food looked sicking, The lady put overcooked carrots on my plate with a side slimy ham and a piece of bread with butter and a small glass of apple juice in a green plastic cup. How did anyone live like this? How was I going to?
Hallie sat down at the a table with the other woman from our cell block. They looked at me, studying me. I poked at my carrots, they turned to a orange mush. I glanced up at them, shoveling the food into their mouths, I guess it was this or starve. So ate it, more like forced it down.
After we had finished, we went outside and sat down at a table.

I enjoyed the warm breeze on my face, pushing my hair slightly away from my face; I let my memories take my away.

"Why won't you talk today? What's wrong with you?" Hailey asked.

I shook the thoughts out of my head and turned my head towards her.

"Just not feeling well today, a lot going though my head" I told her.

She nodded and didn't ask anymore questions.

Woman chattered loudly, It was never quiet around here. Not even at night.

"Oh. Look here comes Miss Diva and her follower"

Hailey laughed at my comment but didn't seem sure if she should or not.

"You got something against her?"

I shook my head "No. I just don't want help"

I watched the two women enter though the gates and nodded at the guards.

We entered the same room as we were in before. I sat in the same seat, across from Liz.

"Why are you here?" I asked Liz.

They did not smile at me; I knew it had to be something serious.

"We need to talk Jaydee"

I nodded. "About what?"

Anita leaned in towards me.

"I am trying everything I can do to find your mother, but even if I do, it is going to be hard. There is no evidence that she was ever in the house and from your words she won't admit to anything"

I watched Anita's lips move as she spoke.

"But maybe we can find away to get her to admit it"

I shook my head.

"She never will. I might as well just give up and finally admit I am going to die in this stupid prison! And just say it was all me, I killed my brother!"

Liz gave me a disapproving expression. She wasn't happy with what I was saying. But it was the truth, I am going to die here, I am going to be stuck here for killing my older brother. My whole life is over!

"We know you didn't kill him Jaydee" Liz said.

"Your getting frustrated aren't you Liz?" I smiled.

"Well, I deal with kids like you everyday, so I'm used to but it does frustrate me that you won't do what is right"

"Why are you covering up for your mother?" Anita asked.

There isn't a point in saying she did it. I know that, why should I try to blame everything on her when all evidence points at me. There is no reports of anything, not even the fact that she almost beat Jesse and I to death, no reports that she abused us no reports of her being a bad mother what so ever.

"The cops have being talking to your neighbors asking if they have heard or seen anything out of the ordinary. So far nothing have being said that is worth anything" Anita said without a smile on her face.

"You wont find anything, she never showed her hate for us when people were around"

"Jaydee, did your mother have friends in the neighborhood?"

I nodded. "She did, but they weren't close. But when they were around she acted well proud to be a mother and she would come up with stories about us and say how much she loved us. It was just a cover-up"

Liz nodded as Anita wrote down what I said.

"Do you think Jesse would want you to lie?" Liz asked.

I narrowed my eyebrows at her. I didn't like how she asked me that. Jesse is dead and he can't have a say if he liked it or not. This was my life. But still I hated Liz for bring him up like that, knowing that his memory hurts me.

"Don't even bring him in to this! This is my fight, my life!"

"Jaydee, this is about Jesse, and you have to do the right thing, for him and for your self"

Well maybe I just wanted to make my own decisions Maybe I just knew that I would be stuck here and there was no way I'd ever see life out of that prison gate.

Liz and Anita left and I returned to my cell, I laid down on my bed choking back my tears. I sat up and grabbed a small bag from the desk, filled with one towel and cheap black pair of flip flops, a tiny bottle of shampoo and conditioner with a pink bar of soap. I put it over my arm and walked into the showers, A few other woman were already showering.
I felt so nervous, having to shower in here among others.
I opened the curtain and removed my clothes hanging them over the shower bar with my towels. I turned on the water and the warm water felt so refreshing, I almost forgot where I was until, the curtain wass whipped open, I turn suddenly, the two woman who had approached me in the yard before stood smiling at me. The one with the spiky hair nudged her friend, they looked like they were admiring a yummy feast that had just been set out in front of them.
The one with the grey hair reached out and grabbed my arm, jerking me forward out of the water, I let out a yelp. The spiky haired lady, swung her fist into my stomach, sending me do the ground. They each took turns kicking me in my ribs, howling with laughter.

"Hey! Leave her alone, Or I will call the guards in and you will be in the hole!"
I curled up into a ball, my body stung with pain. Tears making their way down my cheeks. The woman left and the door slammed shut.
"Are you alright?" A woman asked putting her hand on my wet exposed shoulder. I opened my eyes and glanced up at her, she was a woman from my cell block. I could not remember her name.
"I am going to get some help"
I heard the door open, she started shouting. "We need some help in here!"
loud footsteps raced in,
"She is over here, looks as if she got beat up pretty bad"
A woman guard kneeled down to me, studying my wounds. The woman handed her my towel and collected my things.
"I am going to take you to the medical room" She told me, helping me up and wrapping my towel around my naked body.
It hurt to walk, I winced in pain with every step.
"Don't worry about your things, I will take them to your room"
I gave the woman a small smile, hoping that she took it as a thank you.
She rubbed my arm and turned the other way.
In the medical room, they examined me, making sure nothing had been broken, then they gave me a pain killer and wrapped me up with bandages. They let me stay the night, just so they could monitor me. I was not able to sleep, the pain hurt so bad, both of my sides were purple and blue. The worst part about it was, It remind me of when I had been beaten by my mother, but this time Jesse was not here to save me.