Growing (An Islamic Life) *COMPLETED*

Chapter 36 (Tearing away)

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"Ami, are you okay?" he asks patting my back. All I do is cry against his chest. "Come on, let's go in." He pulls me inside. My head was fixed on his chest as he leads me to the couch. He sits down and I imitate him, hugging him as tight as I can. "Is everything okay with you and Ali?" he asks. The thought of Ali only made things worse. The sting of pain rushed back inside me and I cried harder, loud sobs leaving my mouth. "Okay let me call him and talk" he says picking up his phone and getting up. I pull him by the hand and stop him.

"No Imran. Please! Just please don't!" I beg. He looks at me with concern in his eyes. He cups my face and kisses my forehead.

"Okay, but if I can't call him, then you have to tell me what's wrong." I break away from him and look up to his eyes.

"I c-can't Imran. P-please, p-please don't as-ask me an-anything, p-please" I beg. His eyebrows frown and he opens his mouth, but as a tear drops from my eyes, he closes it and remains silent. He wipes away the tears from my cheeks and sits down next to me.

After what seemed like forever with me and my brother sitting next to each other in this comfortable silence, my heavy breath and cries were now more calm and composed. I knew Imran was just waiting for this moment, for me to start my explanation. I moved in my seat so that I can see him better. I bring my leg up on the couch and cross my leg. I take a deep breath and Imran turned to my direction. It was time.

"Ali cheated on me" I say to him. A wave of nausea creeps up on me as I say the words out loud. No, I said the truth out loud. Imran's eyes grow wide in shock and his mouth kept opening and closing unable to respond to the piece of information I have given him. I hold back a sob which was making it's way towards my lips.

"Are you sure?" was the first thing he asked me. I nod my head looking down as drops of tears fall down. I see his fist clenched on his lap.

"What happened?" He asks me. I open my mouth but he stops me before I speak. "Tell me the everything, and don't even dare leave out a single detail" he warns me. I huffed in anger. There was no reason for him to show his anger on me. It wasn't me who did the wrong. I was wronged.

As I start explaining everything from the moment I went inside the hotel to when I stormed out, Imran's eyes and face became redder by the second. His fist was clenched so tightly that I was sure his nails would dig into his skin. I held his hand and his grip loosens. "Ami, I told you to tell me everything" he says looking sternly at me.

"But I did" I exclaim.

"No, you didn't. You never said why you went to Hilton in the first place." I look up to him with wide eyes as I gulp down the lump in my throat. I played with the hem of my scarf unable to answer the question. "Amina Abdulla, look at me now" demanded Imran. Boy was he pissed. The only time he referred to me by my full name was when he was angry. I looked up at him nervously. "Now tell me the full story. Why did you go to Hilton in the first place?" My hand crumbles the paper that I had hidden in my hand. The faint noise that came from it caught his attention as his eyes lock with it. He opens my hand, taking the creased paper. His eyes travel through it and reading my results. I was just waiting for him to get to the part which would surprise him. I kept looking at his face as his eyes grew wider and he drops the paper looking at me. His eyes were now teary as he looked at me with pity. "Does that mean...?" I simply nod and he gets up and storms off to put his shoes.

"Imran, NO!" I say stopping him.

"Amina, I'm going to kill that bastard" he says. I quickly grab the other shoe away from him and throw it all the way across the room.

"I am not letting you leave."

"I don't care if I have to go with one shoe missing Ami, when I kill that bastard I'll take his shoes with me." I couldn't help but laugh. "This is not funny!"

"I know, I know" I say suppressing a laugh. "But hitting him and killing him won't change anything." His body relaxes as he goes back to the couch and sits down, each breath of his heavier than the previous.

"What do you want to do now?" He asks looking at me. "This is your life Ami, do you want to forgive him and start over? Will you be able to let all of this pass? It's your decision!"

Forgiving him would be easy. I can easily pretend that nothing ever happened. I can start my life over with Ali and move on from this. I cannot imagine my life without Ali. He became a part of my life. No, he became my life. How can I tear him away from it? Will I be happy? Of course not! I will never be happy without Ali.

The truth was that no matter how much I needed him, every time he touches me, I will remember that the same hand has touched another woman. Every time his lips meet with mine, I will know that those lips don't belong to me. Through my eyes I saw him, and through his eyes I saw myself. All I will be able to see now was the disappointment and hurt he caused me. A part of me kept telling me 'you deserve this' while another part was arguing with it saying 'you don't need a man to support you.'

"I don't need him. I am strong enough to be by myself, and even if I am not, I have Allah! I want a divorce!" He nods and takes his phone.

"My friend is a lawyer. I will talk to him, but Amina..." He hesitates while looking back at the paper once more. "Are you sure that this is what you want? At this state, do you really want to be alone? Will you be happy?" He asks.

"I'd rather be alone and miserable than be with him and pretend to be happy, when in reality I will be breaking inside." He nods and goes into his room. I take the crumbled result paper and as I look at it, reality sets in and it's the truth that I have to accept.

I am pregnant and....

And I have cancer.

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Hey lovelies, an update like I promised. So all the cliffhangers and suspense ended with this chapter. I did my research and it turns out you can have cancer and be pregnant at the same time. Some of you guessed the pregnancy but I'm sure none of you saw the cancer coming. Especially you ruasamer 😉 I did outsmart you. This chapter is dedicated to your brains lol.
This chapter is also dedicated to @nishi_mishi for the awesome support she has been giving me with her spamming comments and craziness. 😘 Love you gurl ❤️

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Allah bless all ❤️