Chpt 8

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by StrawBrryMULK

by StrawBrryMULK

Heechul and Momo

Person with disease: Heechul

Diary log
Heechul
Phase 1

I started forgetting small things. Like my keys and phone. But that's normal. Hehe. But... after a while I forgot big things. I have lived in my beautiful home for 10 years and I forgot the number. I forgot my dog... and I'm so scared. Phase one is the Phase I thought would be the easiest. But it's hard. The fear of forgetting my partner... MOMO. Is unbearable. The pain of not knowing. It's all hard.

MOMO Phase 1
He was lost. For a long time. It impacted his work. His social life. He couldn't leave without forgetting something. He was scared. And I was too. I found that reading him stories of our past and present helps him recall things. And I do everything I can to make sure he remembers so he doesn't feel the pain of forgetting... but he kept forgetting.

Heechul
Phase 2
I fainted twice in one day. Fainting isn't scary. It's not the fact that I might fall and hit my head. The scariest thing is fainting in a random place and waking up to somewhere completely different. You have know idea how much time has passed. I was once passed out for 4 days. And I missed Lisa birthday. She helps me though. Whenever I wake up she's there and explains.

MOMO Phase 2
I can't work when he faints often. I leave early everyday and got fired. Financial we should be fine for the mean time. Heechul is scared. I can tell. He forgets things. He faints. The necklace is a massive help to me. This one time Heechul was on the couch watching tv and he fainted. I was scared. The longer he faints... the fear of him not waking up shakes me.

Heechul Phase 3
I can't hear anymore. Her voice. Everything. It's just silence. The high pitched noise is so painful that my ears bleed every night. I don't faint anymore. I still forget little things. But not be able to head is hard. We communicate through writing. I know the next stage... phase 4. So this is my last diary log. For who ever reads this... even if I can't hear I see her cry every night. Don't let your partner break like my did. Please. I was the one that pushed her for more time. Saying we could do this. But it's now we. It's she. She's the one that lives with this. So please change your mind.

MOMO Phase 4
He can't hear. He doesn't make sounds because he doesn't know what he's saying. So we communicate with writing. I think he knows that he won't see soon because he stares at me. I keep trying to tell him to take the medicine but he won't because he says the ringing in his ear is a noise... so he can hear.

MOMO Phase 5
He woke up this morning... not seeing anything. He knew. And he cried. I hugged him and he freaked out and pushed me away. The thought of him seeing only pitch black and hearing ringing would drive him mad. I didn't like the idea of the Phase 5 medicine. I promised him I wouldn't use it. But how are we going to live. Will I shower him, feed him and love him. Financially this isn't going to work out. Mentally he would hate it. How would he express his feelings. No wonder this disease is called EMPTYNESS. He is now just a scared empty body. I regret our decision and I wish he passed away not feeling scared. I hate this.

Doctors note:
Heechul passed away on the day he couldn't see. The guilt of killing him had made MOMO commit.

Why did you give them this diary Doc!?
Why 🥺🥺🥺😖