Your Place Or Mine? BOOK VERSION (PUBLISHED BY VIVA PSICOM)

Chapter 56: Auld Lang Syne

HALEY'S POV

Madrid

Gusto kong maging masaya. Gusto kong pansamantalang makalimutan ang mga problema. Gusto kong makalimutan kahit ilang oras lang ang sakit na nararamdan ko.

In five minutes, New Year na.

New Year.

New Hope.

New Life.

New Me.

Ano ba ang mga kailangan kong baguhin sa sarili ko? Wala akong maisip. I'm not perfect. Pero siyempre, wala kang nakikitang mali sa sarili mo. But other people do. At alangan namang tanungin ko isa-isa ang mga tao sa paligid ko.

Pinagmasadan ko ang sarili ko sa salamin. I always do this. I talk to myself. Parang wala namang nagbabago sa buhay ko. Kapag nagiging sobrang saya ko, asahan mo may kasunod na kalungkutang magaganap. Kaya minsan, parang ayokong maging sobrang saya. Natatakot ako sa susunod na mangayayari.

Tumingin ako sa relo. It's almost midnight.

Isinuot ko ang isang pair ng pearl earrings. It perfectly matches my silver long gown. This is my only accessory for tonight. No bracelets, no necklace. Maliban sa wedding at engagement rings na suot ko. I'm not in the mood to dress up.

"Can you help me with this?" He's holding one of the ties I gave him last Christmas.

Himala. Hindi naman ito nagsusuot ng necktie.

Kinuha ko ang tie at kinabit sa suot niyang long sleeves. I can feel his stare the whole time I'm fixing his tie. And I made sure I avoided his gaze. When I'm done, hinaplos ko ang part ng kwelyo niya na nakatupi. That's when he held my hand. Kahit na labag sa loob ko, napatingin ako sa kanya. The pain in my chest is still unbearable. It's like my heart is torn into broken pieces. And I see him slightly shook his head. Seeing this desperate look in his eyes made me think my eyes gave all my emotions away. He felt me.

This is our first New Year together. We're pretending that nothing horrible happened last Christmas. We're here in Spain, pretending happy in front of my family. We had no choice. It's our own problem, so we should fix it. They don't have to know.

After I left last Christmas, I did not see Russell again. Pinanindigan ko ang paglayo. Hindi ako nagpakita at ganon din siya. Nagkita lang ulit kami nung araw ng flight namin for Spain. I went home to get my stuff and he was there. He must have known that I'd be coming home. We went to the airpot together to meet my Mom.

Binawi ko ang kamay ko at tinungo ang pinto. "Mauna na ako sa baba."

I'm giving him the coldest treatment since we arrived. Lalo na kapag kaming dalawa lang at hindi na namin kailangang magpanggap. Kahit nung nasa flight kami, I never initiated a conversation with him. I closed my eyes that moment I slumped on my seat. Only to wake up in his arms as he sleeps. And I was too sleepy to push him away.

It's now five mninutes to midnight, and everyone is making their way to the pool area. This is the largest New Year feast we ever had. This time, all of my family's business partners and friends are invited.

We stood, cheering and facing North as we wait for fireworks display. And the crowd started the countdown.

Five!!!

Four!!!

Three!!

Two!!!

One!!!

"HAPPY NEW YEAR!" the crowd roared.

It's a pleasant night and what everybody wanted is to have a good time. Tumatalon pa ang iba. Some are locked in a tight embrace while others kissed as they greet everyone. Nakakahawa ang excitement nila. And this is the first time I genuinely smiled since I got here.