Stupid Marimo

Part 9

"You should have woken up by now, marimo", Sanji grumbled and looked at the sleeping form in front of him "I have to talk to you and you should have been awake to hear it. But I can't stand it any longer that I didn't tell you, so I have to tell you like this and I really hope you can hear me and won't hate me afterwards". Sanji shifted awkwardly not sure how to start telling the comatose man what he felt. He sat down on Robin's bed and fiddled with the blanket.
"You see, I always thought that we fought because we had different views on life. But I figured that the fighting was an excuse to be closer to you and I teased you on purpose to get your attention. I am totally aware that this is completely childish but I really didn't have any other chance because I was sure that it wasn't okay for me to like another man like I do... what I am trying to say is that I like you Zoro, no that isn't the right way to put it... I have fallen for you, I am in love with you and I just don't know how to deal with it. Do you have any idea on how I felt when you broke down at my side into a puddle of your own blood? I felt like my heart was shattered into a million pieces and someone stomped on those pieces to be sure they were really damaged. I can't stand this any longer, you being in a coma is the worst torture I have ever endured and I really need you back by my side. I don't know how you take this news because you can't really express yourself like that but you haven't woken up and strangled me yet so I take that as a good sign. I don't want to pressure you or anything but I want you to know that I somehow stopped swooning over the ladies and I am pretty sure that is your fault. I still think they are wonderful, don't get me wrong there, but it seems like I only have eyes for you now. That sounds so chlichee and I know you would hate it" Sanji laughed a little but turned serious again when he saw Zoro's face and that his eyes were twitching a little "but seriously Zoro I caught myself watching you when you were still standing alongside us. And I don't wanna say that I fell for your looks but I have grown to love your pretty face as well, I gotta admit that. Also you have one hell of a body, you look like a god. I got sweaty just by watching you train. And I always considered myself a ladies man... well I guess that might be the reason I don't have luck with the ladies. Why am I even telling you this?! I bet you are laughing your ass off on the inside. Making fun of me and my feelings. Still I need you to know. I hope you don't hate me for loving you. But even if you do that's okay as long as you wake up. I can stand the pain as long as I know that you are safe again. Please wake up Zoro. We need you here, I need you here...it's not the same without you. Luffy doesn't smile as much and everyone is tense. I feel like I am running on an empty battery. I don't sleep much. I spent the day cooking and at night I am watching you sleep. That sounded way creepier than it is. I only have around two hours of sleep a day but I don't really care".
Sanji rested his head against the wall behind him and pulled his knees to his chin. His arms were wrapped around his legs.
"I don't even have that much time to smoke anymore. I am not smoking when I am with you because Chopper said it might have a bad effect and I didn't want to risk him banning me from seeing you. That's how far this has gone, I even nearly stopped smoking for you...maybe I should stop talking before you are going to kill me when you wake up. But it's a lot easier to talk to you when you can't answer. And it's the only reason I told you how I feel. I wouldn't have had the courage to tell you face to face and that makes me sad. I am afraid I can never tell you. But I promise, that when you wake up I will tell you again. I will face the consequences and if you hate me for it then I will understand. But for now I can tell you that I love you", Sanji looked out of the window and watched the waves of the sea. They calmed him down, just like the steady thud of Zoro's pulse had. But while Sanji was staring out the window he didn't notice how Zoro's face had slightly changed to a frown and he couldn't see, even if he had looked at him at that time, that behind his eyelids his eyes were a little wet. And on the side of his face that was facing away from Sanji a single little tear slipped out and fell down onto the pillow. When Sanji averted his gaze away from the waves and back to Zoro he only saw him frowning the slightest as if he was hurt. He wondered if the swordsman might be in pain and leant over to him to feel his pulse that was steady. The moment Sanji touched Zoro the frown disappeared on the face of the green haired man and passed for a content face. Sanji sat back and kept on watching out for Zoro the whole night until Luffy came in the early morning hours to switch places with him so Sanji could prepare breakfast.