twenty two

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"Thanks for basically saving my ass back there," I begin, "I don't know what would've happened without you."

He smiles slightly, "it's fine. I wouldn't care if I don't know you, I wouldn't leave anyone to get harassed like that."

He reaches his hand out between us and I take it, holding it with a small smile. I was glad he was here, comforting me. This week had been rough, for the both of us I think.

"I've missed you," he admits, letting out a heavy sigh and I frown at myself, feeling guilty. "I didn't think you wanted to see me anymore so I took some time off of school."

"I've just had a lot of stuff on my plate," I shrug, looking out at the garden. It was dark and all I could see was the willow trees hanging out over the grass. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have been rude to you and ignored you."

"I figured you needed some time," he says, his thumb running over my knuckles soothingly. I wouldn't have thought this caring boy was the same guy that looked like he was about to kill someone inside that house. I wouldn't put I past him that he could kill someone, really. "But you should know I'm always here to talk."

"Of course," I say and we're engulfed in silence. Should I ask him about Monday night? Or should I just let it go?

"Are you gonna tell me what's been keeping your pretty mind so busy?" He asks, and I look over to him to see his brown orbs already staring right at me.

"I was thinking about Monday night," I say, pursing my lips nervously before continuing. "There's something that happened that I've not been entirely honest about because I didn't want to sound crazy."

He nods, his lips in a tight line as he looks over me curiously, trying to guess what would come out of my mouth. He was smart, he could figure it out easily. He probably has.

"But when the police came, I think I saw the face of one the attackers," I say honestly and he stops himself from tensing but his breathing stops for a moment. He nods, telling me to continue. "Listen, I don't want to sound stupid but I want you to be honest with me, okay?"

"Mhm," He muffles out, his eyes narrowing nervously at me.

"But they guy that stabbed the man," I let out a shaky breath dramatically. I felt like I was in a tv soap or something. "I swear he had curly hair. And then the more I thought about it, the more I thought he looked like you."

His grip tightens on my hand and I think it's more for his own reassurance than mine. I close my eyes and try to think carefully of what to say next. I didn't want to offend him and set off his ADHD again.

"But I sort of put everything together and it makes sense," I look him in the eye but his gaze is set on the floor. My eyes soften at him instantly. "Brad, please look at me."

"I can't look you in the eye when I know exactly what you're gonna say," he shakes his head, closing his eyes. I rub his hand softly. "There's stuff about me, Jamie, that you shouldn't know. You're too kind and innocent to know about it and it's too much of a heavy load for a friend to carry."

"Maybe I want to help you carry this heavy load," I say, surprising myself. Even though he's basically confirmed I'm right, I can't help but want to help him. Maybe it's not as bad as I seem.

His eyes meet mine, "I think it's a best friend duty. Something you shouldn't have to worry about." He let's go of my hand and stands up. I shake my head, not letting him leave me.

I grab his hand as I stand up and turn him around. He's surprised that I followed him, and I hold his cheeks in my hands.

"You know that I know what's going on," I say. "Just tell me, help me understand and help you."

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