Remember When #featured #AllStars

Chapter 22

TOTAL RECALL

To say I was floored would be an understatement.

I stared at him from the safety of my seat, buried in shadow where I could watch without fear of being seen.

It was weird seeing Trip up there, perfectly at home, strutting from one edge of the scene to the other. I sat there, transfixed by the sight of him onstage. He looked so gorgeous in his suit and fedora that it almost put Brando to shame. And my God, the guy could actually act! He even managed a dead-on New York accent. Not bad for a kid who'd only been living here for little more than half a year. By his second scene, you could just feel the audience tuning in, holding their breath with anticipation, engrossed by the performance he was giving.

Once he started singing "I'll Know", I realized that not only could he act, but he could actually sing, too. I watched enviously as he kissed Heather Ferrante, but laughed along with the audience when she slapped him. How many girls would've loved to have done that to him over the years?

I had the most ridiculous guilt, not even knowing what Trip had been up to the past months, hard at work, obviously pouring himself into such an endeavor. Knowing how much of a perfectionist he'd been over our stupid Shakespeare film, I couldn't imagine how obsessed he'd been while preparing for something like this. I kept thinking that I wasn't there to help him with it, wasn't able to be his comic relief during the endless drudgery of rehearsals, wasn't there to encourage him through the frustrating moments that I knew he'd encountered along the way.

I made myself let go of my remorse, at least for the next hour or so, in order to enjoy the show. I decided that it was his big moment and I didn't want to ruin it by letting my overactive brain distract me from it, so I pushed the self-absorbed thoughts aside and focused solely on what was happening onstage.

I smiled as he danced with Heather/Sarah and laughed when he had his huge fight scene with Big Jule. By the time he broke into "Luck Be a Lady", he had won me over; I'd been captivated by his every move, infatuated at his every word.

It was heartbreaking just to look at him.

There was something so beautiful about him, a glow that came from more than just the stagelights, and the more I watched, something deep inside me started to ache.

I felt Coop give my hand a squeeze, and until that moment, I hadn't realized I was crying. I became conscious of what Coop must have already noticed, the few traitorous tears dampening my cheeks.

I knew then that in spite of my denials, despite whatever brave face I'd been presenting to the world, no matter how much I tried to pretend that Trip didn't exist... I'd never stopped loving him.

I gave Coop a quick look of gratitude and squeezed his hand right back, registering why he hadn't told me about his plans to come see his friend in the play that night. Even the mere mention of Trip's name would have hurt me; even though I'd put up a good front, he knew I'd never truly gotten over him. That it should have been Cooper that recognized that- and taken pity- touched me in a way I can't describe.

By the time the play had ended, I was emotionally spent, but at least my eyes were dry. The guys immediately made their way backstage, giving me a moment alone with Lisa.

She was sifting through her purse, trying to find her chapstick, when I asked the million dollar question. "So, am I right to assume you didn't drag me here tonight just to see Penelope in a supporting role?"

Lisa abandoned her search to reply, "No, not 'just'. Penny's been telling me for weeks how good Trip was in this thing. I didn't think you'd want to miss it. Are you mad?"