The Miserable Wife

Chapter 20

 Chapter 20:

Napaluhod si Jed sa harapan ko… he was holding both of my hand as he kneeled down in front of me.

He started to cry. “I’m sorry…” he keeps on repeating those words as he cries.

Ako rin, hindi ko mapigilang maiyak. He was crying as he kneels in front of me. hawak-hawak niya ang mga kamay ko nang napakahigpit.

Why this things happened to us?

Bakit kung kailan ko naramdaman yung kaligayahan na ‘yon?

Bakit ngayon pa kami sinalubong nang unos na ‘to?

A few moments of silence came when Jed and I put ourselves together. No one dares to talk since we recovered in our shcokness and pain. Nakaupo lang kami sa sala.

“You should see your son, Jed.” I already broke the silence.

I look at him. I think he was still in shock. He sighs deeply. “I don’t know if I can…”

His sounds were full of doubts. “Jed…” I can’t say a word…

Hinawakan ko ang isang balikat ni Jed. “He is your son. You should take responsibilities…” he looks at me. In an instant, I smile at him genuinely. “You must do your job being a father to Justine.”

“How can you say those words?” it hit me. “Bakit mo nasasabi ang mga ‘to sa akin kahit na dapat nagagalit ka sa akin? Why are you cheering me up? You should slap me or hate me… or disgusted on me… dapat mo akong kamuhian Leila… I always give you pain…” tumungo si Jed. He put his both palm on his face covering his tears. “I can’t make you happy…” I heard him sob.

I gently tap his back. I hug him so tight. “You always makes me happy Jed… hindi ko magagawang magalit sa’yo… kasi mahal na mahal kita. That is how I love you… I can give you all of me… even my happiness just to make you happy.” He was crying again while looking at me. “Even if it kills me inside… even if it takes a hell to be with you… I’ll take the risk and love you all my heart.” I smile at him as I put my both palms on his cheeks. “Mahal na mahal kita Jed… ganoon kita kamahal. Kaya tatanggapin ko ang buong pagkatao mo… kahit masakit… titiisin ko.”

I don’t know if my words help him… but I should make him see how much I love him, ‘wag lang niya akong iwanan.

I kiss him on his forehead. “I love you Jed… I love you more than you know…”

*****

The next day, Jed and I prepared ourselves to meet his son. I was the one who suggested it. I was the one who tells him to do so… I was the one pushing myself to get wounded even more.

I fix his neck tie. We were at our room facing the body mirror.

He sighs so deeply and looks at me. Hinawakan niya ako sa magkabilang balikat. “Are you sure about this?” he was referring about meeting his son… with Amanda.