Deadly Discern - Book Three ✔️

Chapter Twenty Seven - Playing Dirty

A/N : Song plays in with what Danica needs to be doing. Hehe.

At first I was highly bothered and somewhat dumbfounded that Alex had left so soon after getting back from doing surveillance with me.
Because, I wondered, why did he have to go so quickly?

Admittedly, I had some mixed emotions over it, even though I'd been arguing with myself for having them in the first place. He's a grown man. He has friends. He can do whatever he wishes. I certainly don't tell him what he can and can't do, we are our own people at the end of the day.

But still, this is how it all played out for me on the inside :

First off, I felt alone. And I really wanted to berate myself for this one.

Secondly, I felt completely uncertain, for reasons I couldn't fathom.

And finally, I got hit with a mass amount of boredom. It crashed over me like a giant tidal wave, washing over my mind and body, as though it was letting me know it was the real issue at hand.

Alright, so I'm definitely mostly bored.

The rest was unimportant in the grand scheme of things, I had simply been grappling with myself over the fact that we hadn't done anything with Chester. But Alex is right. We need to pace ourselves with him. My instincts had been driving me again and that is what I still need to get a hold of. Thinking first, rather than acting first, is the biggest issue with me.

I huff heavily, my loud breath the only sound in our silent sitting room. Alex had left a couple of hours before and I'd not yet felt the urge to sleep, despite the long night of surveillance. Instead, I'd taken a seat on the sofa and not moved since. It must be close to 9am, perhaps later. I tilt my head and look down at Ditz curled into my side, I pet her absentmindedly, wishing something would pull me from this great cloud of nothingness.

Boredom is never, ever good for me. Not for my sanity or my peace of mind. It gets me thinking, remembering, longing for things I shouldn't.
Bad, bad, bad.

It's dangerous. For so, so many reasons. And I'm not going to let it get out of hand, I'm in control.
And I need to get over myself and these devilish thoughts that override my emotions.

I grab my phone with urgency, dialling Justine's number right away.

The phone rings only once before she picks up, which isn't the norm.

"Yo, what's the 411?" She answer's enthusiastically, clearly aware of her caller for a change.

"Shit am I bored." I respond with another heavy huff while I slump back into the sofa, body limp and heavy as I rest my head on the cushions behind and stare blankly at the ceiling.

Justine chuckles. "I see. Well, you caught me at a good time, on a good day, I'm actually off work today." She replies happily.

I sit up, only now noticing the unusual quiet on the other end of the line. "Yes! Okay, what are we doing then? I feel like doing something insane. Something that gets my heart pumping, I want a serious adrenaline kicker!"

"Whoa lady, lets just take a sec to think on it. Adrenaline... we could go sky diving?" She's says, in an open ended way.

Money isn't an issue, so the idea isn't a bad one, but I hum in response, not feeling it's the right choice.

"Okay, not sky diving. Err... bungee jumping? Or is the heights thing a no-no?"

I shake my head, saying, "Nah, I'm cool with heights. I was more thinking along the lines of like an obstacle course challenge or maybe we could go paintballing?" I actually hope she goes for the obstacle course thing, because I don't know that the playfulness of paint balling is going to quite cut it. I need more. Much more. I need exhaustion.