My Past, Your Past, Our Future (arranged marriage)

Chapter 48 (third-person P.O.V.)

"Are you sure you're okay Ben?" Shay asked, glancing over at him, as they drove from the restaurant to the church.

"Yes I'm fine, like I was when you asked at dinner...twice," Ben replied with a smile, "just thinking about a lot of stuff, and I didn't sleep very well last night." He finished before turning back to the road and a serious look of deep-thought replacing the smile that was there moments before.

Shay sighed, and resigned herself to gazing out the window for the rest of the drive. Ben wasn't trying to be rude, in reality, they'd had a really nice dinner. But Shay could tell something was off. And it pained her just a bit that Ben didn't open up to her and tell her what was going on, or what he was dealing with.

But, I mean, why should he? Shay thought. I haven't known his very long, and maybe its something private...or maybe he's still struggling with this whole marriage thing? But that didn't seem likely to Shay, since he had seemed to have handled the whole thing better from the beginning. Maybe its work, and he doesn't want to bother me with it...or maybe he has someone else he is going to talk to, or already has... But that didn't fit either Shay figured, remembering Ben didn't have very many close friends at all.

"Hey Ben," Shay said, pulling him out of his thoughts for a moment.

"Yeah?" He asked calmly, glancing over at her before returning his eyes to the road.

"You know I'm here for you...right? If you ever need anything or want to talk about...anything really."

"Thanks Shay." He replied after a moment, with a genuine smile returning to his face.

Instead of speaking another word, Shay reached over and held onto his hand that had been resting on the consul, before returning her gaze out the window. Not another word was spoken for the duration of the trip, but their presence, just being with each other, spoke loud enough and helped calmed any anxiety or worry either one had.

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"Wow! That's so crazy...but super sweet." Another one of Shay's friends said. This was the third similar response the "couple" recieved after someone being introduced to Ben and told the "story". Not about the arranged marriage, of course, but the version Ben and Shay decided to tell everyone to avoid the endless questions.

Once they got the the church, before going in, Ben and Shay sat in the car for a few minutes and discussed what they were going to tell people about the situation. They definitely didn't want to lie to everyone, but the whole story just wouldn't work...at least for now.

So, the story goes...families have been friends forever, Ben's family moved away, they recently moved back, Ben and Shay started 'talking' and found out they had a lot in common, they went on a few dates, and now they're a couple. So, definitely not a lie...but maybe more like a partial truth. At least that's what Ben and Shay told each other.

They both breathed a silent breath of relief when it was finally time for the service to start, a break from all the questions and curious gazes. Shay had grown up with most of these people in the church, so they knew she hadn't had many boyfriends or love interests. And here, out of no where, she shows up with this new, older, mysterious boyfriend. They were all happy for her of course, but the entire situation definitely peaked their curiosity.

As the couple found their way to some seats near the front, the worship began, with one of Shay's favorite songs. It was such a sweet time...in more ways than one. Shay lost herself in worship when she closed her eyes and toned out the world. For that time it was just her and her God. And Ben got to look around and see all these people, whole-heartedly crying out to their God in song. But the one that caught his eye the most, was the blonde haired girl next to him. He couldn't help but stare at his fiancée. She looked at peace, inspired, amazed, and in love. Ben knew church had always been a part of Shaliene's life, but now he could see it with his own eyes...Shay loved her God.

But why? He thought. He still couldn't get over the why. Why did this son die? Why doesn't he just leave us here alone? Why does Shay love him so much? Why do all these people love him so much.

And before Ben knew it, the songs were done, and the pastor was coming up to preach. He noticed in the middle-aged Pastor's hand, he held an old, well-worn book. I've never seen a book used so much...wow.

"Tonight's lesson...and really all of life, can be summed up into one word...Love." The pastor began. "Now, I'm not talking about the romantic kind of love, or the 'I love this pizza' kind of love. But a love that sacrifices, a love that defies all odds or reasoning, a love that came and gave his life up for us, kind of love...

...You see, Jesus willingly came to die for you and me. He stooped down to the muck and mire that is our sin-filled lives, and the punishment for us...he did that for everyone of you...Why? Because he loves YOU, he didn't want us to have to burden the weight of our sins, and he wanted to have a relationship with us. He wanted  to take the burden, so that we could be with him in eternity..."

That phrase hit Ben like a ton of bricks, and it replayed over and over in his mind...he wanted to take the burden...he wanted to take the burden...he loves me...he loves me...

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Shaliene glanced over at Ben throughout the service, seeing if she could perceive what his thoughts were about church and the message in general. But something happened after the pastor brought the gospel, really after he talked about Jesus taking the punishment for us...something changed in Ben...his expression changed into one of deep thought and concentration...Shaliene wasn't sure what it meant, or what he was thinking, but she said a silent prayer that whatever it was, God would give him understanding, peace, and comfort.