War Of Hearts (#1stBook of Heart's Series)

Chapter 8

Going back to the Capital city was an easy road. There's nothing much to remembered on our journey.

But I did make a lot of pleasant memories in Hassa...Theondre was the sweetest to me there. I've known him all my life, but we've never been closer than the past few weeks we spent together there.

Lades,the Capital City of Ashur, was very crowded, as always. People cramped up in the city, doing their jobs, going to schools, just living their life.

Now that I was back to the crowded city, I missed the quietness of Hassa a lot. And the feeling the place gave me.

I have to get back to reality yet again, though. I have to trained everyday, realizing that I was taller, and my muscle grows bigger, lean, and somehow, when I looked into the mirror for the first time I've got home from Hassa, I realized that I didn't looked that bad.

My face used to makes me getting mocked at because I looked too much like a girl, but now my jaw was stronger. I still looked like a girl, but now no one would mistaken my gender with how my body looked.

I was resting today, though. I think it's great that I could just laid alone in one of the palace's garden, smelling the sweet scent of flowers and daydreaming about someone I would never have.

I saw him earlier today, he was taking a stroll with Prince Dai and Queen Tuya.

It's hurts, knowing that he had his own family, that I will never have him in my arms.

I would never be able to have kids with him, despite how much I wanted it. I would never be able to hold him as I fell asleep.

A part of me wished everyday, that I would turned eighteen sooner, so I could go to war and die a honorable death.

So that my love, my secret, can go away with me. So that I'll die, still with love for him. I know the moment I get back from my first war two years from now, my father would forced me into a marriage.

Dying sounds like a much better option for me.

I know, it's stupid. Theondre gets an arranged marriage too, and whether he likes to admitted it or not, he's grateful Tuya gave him a son.

I deserved to build a family of my own as well,but every time I tried to picture it, everything was ruined because Theondre keeps coming into my mind.

I guess in the end, no matter what happens, I would still love Theondre.

Killi said that I was tragic, that I deserved better. That I needed to move on and have a new love.

But I can't. No matter how hard I tried, there's no one else's in my eyes, and my heart, that captivated me as much as Theondre did.

I'm still young, I still have chances to explore the world, Killi said. But what kind of world? Theondre was my world.

Yeah, I was obsessed. I realized that, I knew that. But I can't changed the way I loved him. The way he makes me feels special every time he's around. The comforting and save feeling I got around him.

I sat up, stretching my arms before standing up, deciding to go to find Theondre, hoping he's not busy at this time.

And he was busy. He was in his throne room, sitting on his big throne, scrolling through papers.

"Are you busy, my lord?" I asked. Theondre looked up, and I felt a sense of happiness filled me as his face lits up the moment he saw me.

"Paperwork" he said, making a long, tired sigh. "Oh how I love to be king" he said dramatically, throwing his head on one of the arm of the throne, his feet on the other arm.