I was unloading a surfboard from the roof of my truck when I heard a mumbled voice behind me say, "Man, chicks are sooo easy!" I looked down and saw a guy about my age, hung over and half asleep in the back seat of his convertible. Apparently, he had been unable to drive home after his date the previous evening. Unsure of what to say to him, I took my board and walked to the beach.
Sitting on the water that afternoon, I did more thinking than surfing. I thought of the times I had used girls and the times that I had felt used by them. I thought of the times that I was congratulated for my impurities and mocked for the innocence I managed to retain. A quote I once read echoed in my head: "Until a man knows he's a man, he will be trying to prove that he is one."1
What does it mean to be a man? How does a guy establish his manhood?
Most of us learned in the locker room that losing your purity proves your masculinity. But we all know that something is missing from this picture of manhood. Behind all the bragging about sexual conquests on prom night, every guy harbors a deeper longing to cherish a girl. For example, when a guy imagines his future bride, he doesn't think about "getting some" from her. He thinks about giving his life to her.
Despite what the world seems to think, most guys are not players who intentionally victimize clueless women. Sure, those guys exist. But nowadays it seems like there are just as many girls out there who are using guys. There is a battlefield of love and lust within everyone's heart. Thankfully, our call to love runs deeper than our temptation to lust. For proof of this, one need only look as far as the outside of a strip club. There will be a neon sign claiming that there are "gentlemen" inside. No matter how far we fall, we never forget that we are supposed to be men.
The purpose of this booklet is to help you to choose the good and live it out. It is not a condemnation but a challenge to accept the demands of authentic manhood and, in doing so, to become a blessing to women and a visible image of God the Father's love.
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Pure Manhood
SpiritualHOW TO BECOME THE MAN YOU ARE MEANT TO BE... Everyday boys and young men are bombarded with messages and images that encourage them to make sexual impurity a way of life. And since it looks so much fun, they can easily be made to feel as if t hey'...
