I don't remember. I don't remember anything anymore. My days go by in a blur. I laugh and smile but I don't recall why. I just grown tired of living this life. Tired of the lies, the stares, the whispers, of trying to be happy, everything. All these heartaches and stomach wrenches. This feeling of helplessness and frustration I'm tired of it all. So I decided to tune everything out to not pay attention anymore it's better that way.
But then he came along. I thought he is the key receiving the life I desire. I became attached. Even though it had been just for a little while i had truly liked him. He made smile and gave me butterflies. But then my past ruined it. I now he has left me confused. I thought he liked me too. But I don't know anymore. One day he says he can't be with me but then the next he says he didn't mean it. I just don't understand how I feel.
I've lost myself. I no longer know who am I anymore. I tried to end it all. I'm weak and a loser so I tried to take the easy way out. I took a handful of some RX drugs and went sleep. As my world became dark I pleaded to God for just this once let me sleep and never wake up. I don't mind if I go to hell. I've a slave for the devil for many years. I belong there anyway. But sadly God didn't lost answer my prayer. And left me alive. I don't why though. I'm corrupted. I cannot be beneficial in anyway. There is no hope for me. I am lost........with no desire to try and find myself.
YOU ARE READING
Suicidal Journal
Teen FictionEnter a mind of one who is confused. Someone who has no one to talk to. Someone who agonizes in pain and desperation. This is a story about a typical teen's suicidal journal. *please note that this story is written poetically*
