It Starts With A Party

EPILOGUE

Epilogue:

I called, “Let’s go boys!” Mayson came running down the stairs, being followed by his brother. His brother I named Kyrin after Kyra. It was my tribute to her.

Mayson asked, “Where we going?”

I said, “You know where you are going.” They nodded, suddenly calm and sad.

Kyrin asked, “Can’t we go with you, Papa?” It shocked me a little bit. They never wanted to go before.

Mayson nodded in agreement, “Please!” I sighed. I never wanted to let them see my tears, but I couldn’t keep them from their mother. They will be ten in a week. It is time they knew.

I nodded at them. They grinned and hugged me, “Yay!” I got my coat and shoes on while they did the same. I grabbed my backpack and slipped it on my shoulders, walking out the door.

They skipped ahead on the sidewalk. It was a very bright day. Birds sang in the trees as we walked down our road. The green grass was sprouting through cracks in the sidewalk. By the time we arrived it was dark and they were by me again.

Mayson whimpered, “My hands are cold, daddy.” I pulled out gloves and put them on both of them as everyone else began showing up. They ran over to Uncle Dez as he approached with Rina. It was his wife and the kids absolutely adored them. I pulled out candles as Lucas and Savannah came over, lighting them with frowns etched into their faces.

Lucas said quietly, “You brought the kids.”

I nodded, “They wanted to come. Who am I to keep them from their mom?” He didn’t say anything.

Savannah said, “I think this will be good for them. They will see how important she is.” I nodded slowly, helping pass out candles.

Kyrin asked, “Do I get one?”

I said, “No. I already told you that you can’t have fire at all forever.” Last week he had lit the curtains on fire. He was a little pyro.

Dez saved me from Kyrin whining, “You and I are going to share. There aren’t enough candles anyways.” I nodded gratefully as Mayson was already sitting on Rina’s lap, sharing her candle and looking around curious. He didn’t know what was going on. Kyrin sat down next to them on Dez’s lap. I sat next to them in the circle, completing it. 

In the center of our giant circle was Kyra’s grave. This was our thing every six months. It was our tribute to Kyra and everything she did to help us all. We all joined hands and Savannah started singing softly. We joined in, one by one, our voices sounding not perfect, but decent together. Mayson and Kyrin were even singing as they had learned these songs at a very young age.

After finishing quite a few songs Kyrin suggested Hallelujah. We sang it too. I pulled out a crumpled piece of paper and unfolded it gently.

I began, “Do not stand at my grave and weep. I am not there. I do not sleep.” I closed my eyes, having this poem engraved in my brain. “I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on the snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn rain. When you awaken in the morning’s hush, I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there. I did not die.” I finished the last sentence with a strong voice despite my insides crying. I knew tears were slowly dropping down my face. It was silent as everyone was lost in their own thoughts and memories of Kyra.

Kyrin crawled out of Desmond’s lap and sat in front of her tombstone. We all watched silently, waiting to find out what he was going to do.

He said, “Hiya, Mommy.” Those two simple words made my tears come faster. He continued, “I’ve never been to one of these before, but daddy let us come this time. He really loves you. I really love you too. He always said this night was important because two amazing people were brought into the world and one incredible was taken out.” I swallowed hard as Mayson joined him. Everyone was watching now.

Mayson said, “I don’t think that is fair. Two amazing people aren’t worth one incredible one. That just isn’t fair.” I wiped my eyes.

Kyrin said, “This is Mayson. You named him. I’m Kyrin. Daddy says that he named me but I was named after you.” I covered my mouth as a sob threatened to escape.

Mayson said, “I miss you. So does daddy. I hear him cry in his room sometimes.”

Kyrin chimed, “I miss you too!”

Mayson said, “Gram-Gram tells us stories all the time. We like it. We’d ask daddy too but we know he is sad.” I was sobbing silently now. By the time they finished talking to their mom everyone was sobbing except them but they were sad. I crawled over to them, pulling them into a protective hold. They cuddled into my side.

Kyrin asked after a long while, “Daddy, can we come see mom again tomorrow?”

I said softly, “We can come see Mommy anytime you guys want to, I promise.” We sat there a very long time. Everyone had already gone except for my parents who wanted to give us a ride home. Both boys were asleep before I finally had enough strength to actually stand up. I carried them to my parents’ car and put them in their seats before climbing between them.

Mom said, “I think it was right to let them come, Dexter. It will help both you and them.” I nodded as we pulled into my drive. I carried the boys inside and changed their half-asleep forms into pajamas. They fell back to sleep in my bed but I didn’t mind. I put my own pajamas on and hugged them to each of my sides closer.

I whispered, “I love you boys.”

They both mumbled tired, “I love you too.” I let my eyes close and realized how exhausted I actually was.