Don't Tell Jack... (Mark X Anti)

Part 18

Mark's POV

Something was wrong with me. Whenever i looked at him... i saw HIM. MY Jack. i didn't want to, i tried so hard to see the Jack i knew, my friend... i couldn't. When i looked into his eyes, it was like i was seeing past him, Into him, my eyes were searching him for something i knew i couldn't see....

"Mark? Are you okay?"

His eyes were still wet with tears. But i could care less about a plate. i could buy a new plate. The perkiness he'd had last time i'd seen him in the living room was gone. he was back to his odd defensiveness. Apologetic. I didn't get it.

"Yeah, i'm fine." i flashed him a smile, hoping to let him know i wasn't mad.

"I'm so sorry..."

"Don't be. It's not important"

He looked at me. but he seemed to be thinking. or listening. maybe both, though i wasn't saying a word. His eyes widened in disbelief.

"What? whats wrong?"

His eyes cleared. he looked at me still, but now he was seeing me. He gulped, his eyes searching my face as if id said something wrong. i hadn't said anything. i knew that. the silence bit into me. i wanted to know what was wrong. what id done. Jack sighed.

"It's... It's nothing."

"Jack, if i did something wrong-"

"ye didn't do anythin' wrong. i'm the screwup..."

I was done. he wasn't a screwup. he wasn't a bad friend. if anything i was a horrible friend. He was JACK. he was Jack. my FRIEND. my positive, follow your dreams, scream at the top of your lungs until you cant breathe friend. he wasn't supposed to be like this. he wasn't supposed to be this sad. he wasn't supposed to be this defensive... or this quiet.

"Jack... you need to cut it out. this isn't you. I've tried to let you be, let you tell me what you think you need to tell me. but you need to TELL me what's bothering you. you need to be honest Jack. i cant stand you being like this."

He looked at me with wide eyes, like id found his secret. did he think he was hiding it?

"Mark... I..." tears built at the corners of his eyes. i hated them. i HATED to see him cry. "I dont know what im doing Mark! im such a cruddy friend! why do you even keep me around?! After what i DID to you..."

"What you did to me? Jack, what the hell are you talking about?!"

He pushed away, his bandages rough against my shirt. "Just forget it! i dont want to cause any more trouble than i have already." and with that he slipped out the bathroom door.

i decided to leave him be. i couldn't force him to talk. I sighed, rubbing the bandaid wrapper between my fingers. This couldn't have to do with My Jack, could it? No. My Jack was my own. Jack was Jack. My Jack... he couldn't do anything wrong. I knew it.

I threw away the shredded wrapper and walked down the hall to my room. Vidcon was the next day. Jack wasn't fit for it... He sure hadn't done a good job hiding his problems from me. He wasn't normal. His fans would see. I sighed. That was out of my hands. I had a lot of work to do before my panel in a few days. The signing was tomorrow though, and I WAS exited for it.

I laid back on my bed, my thoughts spiraling like a merry go round. They meshed together, forming a knot of anxiety deep in my stomach. This week had been the most confusing bitch of a week in my life. I had so much to do, to think about, to fix, it was fucking up my brain.

I forced myself out of bed and into my work desk. Panel panel panel... I groaned in frustration. PANEL! I literally just had to make like, five activities! My brain was fucked. And I started to think My Jack had found a way to fuck my brain. I wouldn't be surprised.
Sorry for the huge gap! I've been working on a SUPER LONG rp with a friend and I've been obsessed! I couldn't think of anything but that storyline, but I think it's finally time to try and get back into this considering you all seem to like it so much. Thanks by the way! It's getting way bigger than I expected! Sorry for the short chapter, I feel so bad!