Complications (BxB)

Chapter TWENTY

Blake's POV*

WARNING! MATURE CONTENT!

A funeral was being held tomorrow. I couldn't tell if it was just me, or if everyone felt the weight in their heart. The tug of pain at the loss of a pack member.

We hadn't really liked each other at first, but he helped to save me. Axel had picked me up when I was at my lowest and got me away safely. He reunited me with Micah when I felt like I had no right, when I felt like I was nothing. He helped me realize that my life was worth living. I wish I could have done the same for him...

It's been only a month since his... departure... and everyone has been moping about. You could still feel the heaviness of loss clinging in the air. I still feel like there should've been something that we could have done for him. I was almost a little mad at him, angry that he took his own life with no regard for those around him, those that loved him. Those that still do.

I almost felt partially to blame, if I hadn't caused such a mess, coming into Micahs life, none of this would have happened... I never even got to properly thank him for what he did that day... saving my life. The thought made my heart feel heavy. But this wasn't about me, or about how I felt.

This was about celebrating a life, one that was cut short, a life that was worth more than we knew. A life that saved me. He didn't deserve the hand he was given. He was a good man. He deserved so much more than he received...

His family, his human family, will be coming for the funeral. I'm not sure any of us know how to react to that. His brother, Trevor, was the only other one like us.

Sighing, deciding to push the sad thoughts away, I rolled over in the warm bed and snuggled closer to the man I had fallen for.

"Hey, pup." He offered me a smile, but not only didn't it reach his eyes, his voice sounded light with sadness, something that made my heart falter.

I hated seeing him so sad.

Gingerly reaching up, embarrassment heating up my face, I placed a soft kiss on his cheek, then his nose, then his neck.

When I pulled back to look at him, I couldn't help but take in how gorgeous he was. He was breathtaking, his eyes closed in bliss and his lips lifted slightly in content, neck tilted back.

I kissed him again, lightly biting to see how he'd react.

When he moaned, my pants tightened slightly.

Fuck.

Without my permission, a whimper escaped my lips and I crawled into his lap, only whimpering louder when I felt how tight his pants were as well.

"Blake...." His voice was hesitant, as if knowing how this would end.

I gulped and thought. Trying to chase away the fear and doubt that was slowly capturing my mind, I reminded myself that he was dead, and this was my mate. That I was safe.

Even with my own encouraging thoughts, a shiver ran through my body, and I knew I still wasn't ready.

I closed my eyes and took a shaky breath. I wasn't ready for.. that.

But that didn't mean everything was out of the picture.

Reaching out, I held his hand, knowing it's comfort would give me the strength and confidence I needed.

When I opened my eyes, I saw him looking at me, full of love, adoration, and want.

This wasn't lust, this was love.

That alone gave me enough confidence to smile and slowly pull away for him, only to unzip his pants and grab his now pulsing erection.

Hearing the throaty moan he gave, confidence surged up my spine. Slowly pulling his pants past his waist, I continued palming him through his underwear, loving the way his hips squirmed and jerked, even if it was only slightly, into my hand.