Last chance for honour

Chapter 48

Update: Hi guys, just to let you know I am working on another fan video for Jamie and Sansa, I'm about half way through editing it, so it shouldn't be too long till I upload it! Thankyou all for you lovely comments as well, glad you're all enjoying the story!

---

Sansa padded softly through the corridors, Jon had sent for her for breakfast. When she arrived, Arya and Rickon were all ready at the table. She took a seat at the table next to Jon.No one spoke, none of them knew what to say to one another. Sansa thought it strange, they were all siblings, yet barely knew each other any more. Jon broke the ice first. "Did you sleep well?" He asked her. Sansa nodded "yes very well thankyou" she couldn't remember the last time she had slept that well.

The silence returned to the table. Sansa wondered where Jamie was, she didn't think it was the right moment to ask, but she did anyway. "Where is Jamie?" She looked at Jon, who avoided her eye. "He thought it best if he remained in the Lannister camp, I should imagine he's readying his men for his journey to Casterly Rock." Sansa looked at him in shock, she had expected Jon to tell her which chambers he had been given, not that he was still in his camp.

"He's going back so soon?" Sansa spoke plainly. Jon raised his head to meet Sansa's gaze. "Of course, there is no more need for him here, he told me of his plans to return South himself." Sansa said nothing more of the matter, she continued her polite conversation with her siblings through breakfast. She forced herself to eat her meal, she didn't want them to worry about her loss of appetite. After breakfast, Sansa and Arya took a walk in the Godswood. The silence continued between them. The only sound was the cold snow crunching underneath their feet.

They reached the log underneath the great Weirwood tree, sitting themselves down just where their father used to sit. "Are you going to see him?" Arya blurted. Sansa looked at her for a moment. "Yes, I need to speak to him" Sansa replied knowing who she was talking about. "Jon doesn't want you to go to him" Sansa nodded "Yes I know". Arya waited a moment before speaking again.

"Do you love him?"

Sansa couldn't answer her. Her sisters question took her back to when she had first told Jamie she loved him. After telling him she wondered is she had said it without truly knowing what love was. He was a Lannister, she was a Stark. She shouldn't love him, she understood Jon's wariness of him. But in Kingslanding he was all she had, he was her husband she was supposed to love him. But now, everything was different.

She had taught herself not to rely on other people to protect her. She knew no one could keep her truly safe. Even Jamie couldn't stop Ramsey. She had to learn to protect herself now.She remembered Cersei's words "love no one but your children". She knew how cold Cersei's heart was, even to Jamie who had loved her. But she couldn't help but think she was right all along. Perhaps it was easier not to love anyone.

All love had brought her was pain, all those she had loved had died. Her Father, her Mother, her brother. But she still had Jon, Arya and Rickon. She couldn't stop herself loving them, they were her family.

But she couldn't stop loving Jamie either.

She knew her brothers and sister would never understand her love for him. To them, he was the enemy. How was she supposed to choose between her family and Jamie.

---

Sansa wrapped her cloak around her neck, bringing the hood up over her head. She followed the bleak corridors until she had reached the courtyard. It was already nightfall, she made her way to the stables. Brienne was waiting for her with two horses ready.