Cameron's Pov
I winced a bit when Namjoon had dragged me to a more quiet area of Hongdae roughly.
"Listen I'm not gonna be rude I'm not gonna get into a fight with you I just wanna know why?" Namjoon said quite sternly gripping my arm with a killer grip.
"Okay." I whispered looking at Namjoon who was waiting lifting one eyebrow up "me and Jungkook were dating when he was trainee since he was fifteen." I stammered when Namjoon was shocked "you guys had been dating that long." He exclaimed.
I nodded shakily like "we had a little age difference me seventeen, Jungkook fifteen but I loved him I never wanted to him to get hurt." I stammered sadly Namjoon sighed deeply his head dropping.
"He has been having dreams about you since 2015 he always is crying and screaming loudly and each morning we have to comfort him he has almost run his voice out raw." Namjoon pointed out I was stunned. I would never have thought I blinked me.
"Seeing him or him seeing me isn't gonna help him it will make him worse." I tried explaining "are you crazy?" Namjoon asked me loudly.
"Seeing you will make it better actually listen we never knew Jungkook was gay, hearing all this stuff now makes sense why he cries easily, why he would bruise easily why when he would come back to the dorm he looked like he had been crying it was over you," Namjoon whispered to me.
I fluttered my eyes still holding my bag of things "I hurt him Namjoon when I have attacks it hurts everyone around me I feared one-day Jungkook would get so hurt he could have died there was no way I would live if that happen." I exclaimed when Namjoon eyes soften.
"I hear you I am not blaming you at all the disorder you have was inherited or developed you can't control that I know that," Namjoon said seriously to me.
"But you need to take responsibility for what was damaged that you broke someone sensitive by your selfish actions," Namjoon said annoyed looking at me.
I gulped hard nodding "I know what I did was selfish Namjoon I'm sorry that you guys have to deal with the heartbreak all this time it was my actions causing this but I can't get back with Jungkook, not in this state he wouldn't want to." I clarified to Namjoon who hit the wall of the building annoyed clutching his fist.
"I'm not saying get back together be in his life once again visit him once and they will all leave you be to your life," Namjoon muttered to me I squeezed my eyes tighter.
"Namjoon look what Jungkook had he has created a name for himself Jeon Jungkook he should be the happiest person with his success he is how Bts is, how many people love adore him one person who left his life shouldn't affect him his eomma wanted him to have the perfect girlfriend that's what he should have," I exclaimed giving too much thought.
Namjoon looked at me deeply while my chest rose and feel fast from the outburst "there's more to this isn't there." he whispered I threw my head back laying it on the side of the building looking away.
"Yes, there is." I whimpered looking from Namjoon when he inhaled hard "just one visit Cameron will leave you alone after just one visit?" Namjoon asked me peeking at from the corner of his eyes.
I let a small sad chuckle hitting the wall hard with my empty hand "how did you find me I knew coming here would be bad." I chuckled sadly then looked down at the concrete at my shoes.
"When do you want the visit?" I asked when Namjoon leaned on the wall with me "how long will you be here?" Namjoon asked me I shrugged a bit rolling my shoulders.
"I was gonna leave next week I'm in a hotel how about next week the day before I leave?" I suggested Namjoon looked at me with a sad gaze but firmly nodded.
"Alright give me the hotel name I'll pick you up I'll take you to big hit." he explained I nodded "alright," I whispered digging into my pocket for my phone handing it to Namjoon who took it putting his number in focus.
