Life's Not A Doughnut

Chapter 8 ~ Before

The plate shatters into a million pieces as soon as it touches the ground, a violent sound accompanying it.

We both pause to look at the mess, then return to glaring wildly at each other.

"Uncalled for." I retort simply.

"You won't listen to me!"

"Well it's not like I've had much practise, you never seem to have anything useful to say."

A cheap blow, I know.

Will crunches his hand into a fist and bangs it on the kitchen table. "I keep telling you I don't want to talk about it, ok?!"

"You never want to talk about anything to do with us unless it involves getting laid!"

"That is so not true and you know it!" He yells back, fire burning behind his eyes.

I squeal with frustration. We have been fighting like this off and on for weeks, and it is growing less and less tolerable. Brett, Will and Mia's dad, has been sick and is not getting any better. You would think that in low times like these that me and Will would come together and rely on each other for support. Only it has done the opposite, putting a heavy strain on our already fragile relationship.

Our fights always begin over something small, like a change in tone during a conversation or about plans for the weekend. Then they explode into a full blown argument about everything, especially my desire to ask about our future together.

"I don't understand what your problem is about discussing the future! Our future." I yell at him.

"I don't have to explain myself to you, Nora. I'm sick of you on my case all the time about what we are going to do and where we are going to go after we graduate. Maybe I like not having a plan. I don't have to know everything, unlike you."

"Oh so now you have something to say? Finally! Because I've been trying to figure out what you're thinking for as long as I've known you. I never know what you think about anything because you never talk to me or tell me how you feel!"

"Do I have to?"

"Yes! It's what best friends and couples do!"

"Well then maybe I don't want to be either of those with you!"

The kitchen falls dead silent as if no one was even in the room. Both our chests are heaving with angry breaths, every muscle in my body is tightened.

I can feel the tears welling in my eyes even though I'm trying so hard to keep them away. They slither independently down my cheeks, a reminder that I still care about him.

"Nora," Will starts again, "I didn't mean that."

He avoids saying sorry. He is too stubborn for apologies.

"Then why did you say it?"

He looks at the plate he smashed on the tiled floor and sighs. "I'm tired of fighting with you."

My body comes closer to relaxing. "Me too."

He looks at me now with a sad look in his eyes. I know he is hurting. He is close with Brett, so him being sick is chipping away at Will's strong exterior shell.

"I need to study," Will looks away, "I'll call you tomorrow."

And with that, he's gone.

I sit on the cold floor with my back against the cupboards. As I wipe my tear stained cheeks, Mia comes in through the back door with grocery bags in her hands.

She looks at me apologetically, "I heard you two from the driveway."

This only makes my tears return and my stomach drop. She abandons the shopping and quickly slides down to the floor beside me, wrapping me into her embrace.

"I'm sorry, Nors." She strokes my hair.

"It's ok, not your fault." I mumble through sobs.

"Is it over?"

"No, but it's heading that way." The thought sickens me right to my very core.

"You guys can get through it," she says, "When dad gets better, Will will get better, then you two will get better."

Cassie struggles through the door with more bags in her hands and stops as soon as she sees me. She stands there, examining the situation carefully.

"I'll get us some doughnuts." She nods, like her sugar coated treats can fix anything.

Mia kisses my forehead then helps me up off of the floor.

"We will go over to your house to study."

I nod slowly and pull myself together. I know that the last thing I want is to lose Will, and if that means taking a break from us for a while, then that's what I will do.

~~~~~