Every Cliche in the Book

Fake Date

Connor tapped the driving wheel while staring at the red light, "So you excited?"

Alice looked over at him, "What exactly do you mean by that? Am I supposed to be excited or something?"

He chuckled a bit, "Just because we aren't doing what the others think, you shouldn't be unenthusiastic about it. We're still doing something fun and you get some yummy treats. Not to mention you get to meet my real lover while everyone else thinks it's you."

She nodded, "You're right. Sorry for not really giving you an answer and just asking you things too. I've been a little distracted since gym."

He started driving again, "That's understandable. It was a lot to take in. But it's not important for now so just don't think about it. What kind of movies do you like?"

Alice shrugged. She didn't care what kind of movie she watched, as long as it wasn't terrible and made sense in the end. If she could tell what was happening, she usually liked it. Though, it wasn't exactly common for her to watch a movie.

Not to mention, the last movie she saw was at that drive-in. She hardly got to watch that one. Rick was hugging and kissing her too much and kept blocking her view while Derek kept trying to get her attention. Those two ruined the movie because of a petty fight and when she choose both they freaked out.

Connor stopped driving and got out of the car, after shutting the engine off. He quickly ran over to the other side of the car. Alice was confused as he opened the door for her. He didn't do the same thing when they got into the car, but that was because Alice had sprinted ahead of him and got in before he even got to the car.

She smiled and thanked him before getting out of the car. He shut the door and walked up to the house.

It was huge, almost a mansion.

He opened the door for her and she walked in. It was even bigger on the inside. It was completely amazing.

Alice's eyes sparkled as she looked around. She knew he was amazing but she didn't know he lived somewhere like this. Was he rich?

 Connor laughed as he looked at her, "I can tell you're surprised. But keep in mind, this doesn't mean I'm going to buy you a bunch of gifts. I do that for my real lover. I will buy you snacks as rewards though. Might occasionally get you actual gifts to pretend I love you. Also, I'm definitely not the only one to live here. It's not just my family, there's a bunch of other people too. They're all busy tonight though. So they aren't here."

She looked at him, "If those girls found out you were rich as well, you'd have to buy repellent. They probably know now though. I saw them following the car. It's easy to tell when a car is hot pink and has eyelashes."

Connor laughed more, "That's the truth. Come on, follow me. My lover is in the living room, you can choose a movie with them while I make snacks to eat while we watch."

The two walked to the living room and entered.

Alice stared at the boy laying on the couch. He had messy blonde, almost white, hair and dark brown, almost red, eyes. His skin was so pale it looked like he hardly ever went outside or even opened curtains. He was obviously thin but wore a large grey sweater.

Connor smiled and poked the boy's face, "Hey stop zoning out. We have a guest. You two need to pick a movie while I get food. Her name is Alice by the way."

With that, Connor quickly exited the room and started walking to the kitchen.

Alice looked at the boy, "Um hello. So I guess you're Connor's boyfriend. Nice to meet you."

He looked up at Alice and frowned, "My name is Dany, Connor says it means dark. Also, I'm not his boyfriend."

"But you two are dating right? That would make you his boyfriend."

"I'd have to be a boy before I could be anyone's boyfriend. Get your facts straight."

Alice blinked, "Does that mean you identify as a female? I'm sorry. So you're his girlfriend."

Dany sat up and stared at Alice, "I'm not a boy and I'm not a girl. I'm Dany. Please don't just assume my gender. This fact means that I am not Connor's boyfriend or girlfriend. I am his lover. That is all we use to identify me when speaking about our relationship status. Please do not refer to me as a he or she."

Alice stared in confusion and shock but nodded. This was going to be confusing and terrible when trying to talk to them, that's for sure.

Dany smiled, "I think we should watch a romcom. How about Hitch? I've always loved that one."

Alice nodded. Honestly, she had never seen it. It never seemed interesting to her so if it was ever brought up, she'd just act like it was a bad movie and she never wanted to hear about it again. But she felt like messing with Dany would bring some terrible consequences so agreeing seemed like the best option. She would be able see the movie for the first time and understand why people would get really upset when she said she didn't like it.

She looked at Dany again, "I know this is gonna sound crazy but I think you should know it. At school I'm pretending to be Connor's girlfriend so that the bimbos that are there will leave him alone. He thinks that they won't believe him if he says he's taken since you don't go to school."

Dany smiled, "Sounds like something Connor would think of doing. Thanks for protecting my big wolf. He's such a nice guy but he can't stand sluts. He once ranted about some girl hitting on him even though he very obviously was talking about dating me to someone else. That was funny."

"I can't help but wonder this. Why don't you go to school?"

They looked to the side, "Well, I have a lot of issues. I have really light sensitive eyes and a condition that makes it impossible for me to be in sunlight for more than a half an hour, tops, at a time. Not to mention I usually sleep during the day because of those conditions and I have social anxiety disorder, though you don't set it off as much as I think someone like you would. Plus, I'd need my parents to enroll me but I ran away from home two years ago because I told my parents about not having a gender and they started abusing me. I also told them about dating Connor and it was even worse. Kept saying they didn't raise their son to be some piece of shit like the way I actually turned out to be. But it's okay. I like staying at this house."

"Oh."

Dany ran their hands through their hair, "Sometimes Connor and I go on night walks. He says it's good that I exercise, even though I usually don't. Every time we walk a bit more than the time before. I think it makes him really happy to see me trying to be healthy. The best I can at least. I'm a frail person."

Suddenly Alice heard Connor in the doorway, "Dany, you're amazing even if you are frail. You're trying and that's what counts. I love you, my precious bat."

Alice raised an eyebrow, "First Dany calls you their wolf, now you call Dany your bat. What the hell kind of nicknames are those?"

Connor laughed, "Some people used to think I was a werewolf and Dany was a vampire. It's not that much of a surprise though. So now we've just grown used to calling each other bat and wolf. It's nice."

"This is the weirdest fake date I've ever been on."