Going Up - Now On Amazon

Chapter Sixteen

“As far as I know they’ve taken a copy of the recording off the phone, I don’t know much else, but the police man I was speaking to when I picked my phone up this morning said the case would be opened and he’d be charged”

I took a deep breath and ran a tired heavy hand through my messy bed hair. God I must look a fright.

“I don’t need to be scared anymore” I whispered, relieved and shocked at the same time.

“No, you don’t. He won’t be out of jail anytime soon”

Nick pulled his hand back, and lay it in his lap. He darted his eyes away from mine. What had caused his sudden change in demeanor? I craned my neck to see behind me, outside of the glass window of my room and in to the hall. The cruel hard blinding light of a flash stung my eyes. It wasn’t a pap, which was a relief, just some young girl, blonde and tall. Probably someone who had applied to the books… she looked like model material.

“I should probably go” Nick whispered, shuffling forward in his seat

Oh

 

I really didn’t want him to leave, I wanted to tell him that. But I didn’t.

“Thank you for being there Nick. I owe you my life”

Nick frowned and shook his head emphatically

“No, you don’t owe me a thing Sarah. I owe you, if anything. Call me if you need too. Goodbye”

He spoke like we wouldn’t see each other again, and I knew that once I was back at work, back filing, I probably wouldn’t either. I frowned at the realisation, Not seeing Nick was like eating toast without butter…. To me, it just wasn’t right.

But I couldn’t, I couldn’t be his secret. I’d been a secret, kept a secret for most of my life and secrets were horrible hateful things. Even good secrets left me feeling cold.

Nick leant down and pressed his lips against my forehead then walked over to the door. He looked back over at me one last time, and I just continued staring, hypnotised by my own self pitying trance.

The police paid me a visit, and explained that the recording had been handed over to the detectives in charge of my mothers case. My father had admitted guilt, apparently with glee over how he’d managed to get away with it for over a decade. He explained it meant I wouldn’t need to attend any hearings or make any statements unless there was something else he needed to be charged with.

I didn’t say anything about the abuse, not out of shame… because while I was still battered and bruised by my life with my father, I wasn’t ashamed of myself anymore. I didn’t say anything because I truly felt that he’d get his comeuppance,  a life sentence.

If he’d not admitted guilt then I’d have done it, I’d have thrown the book at him and have him put away because of the wrongs against me. But either way he wouldn’t walk the streets anymore, he couldn’t hurt anyone else and that made me happy.

I could close the door on the fear and heartache, and that truly was an amazing gift.