(My Brothers Bestfriend) Looks Can Be Deceiving.

(My Brothers Bestfriend) Looks Can Be Deceiving 17

(Age 11)

"--Open up the dirty windows, let the sun illuminate the the words that you can not find," I sing loudly into the deodorant can that's become my temporary microphone. I throw one of my arms up and close my eyes, screaming the next part to one of my favorite songs. "Reaching for something in the distance, so close you can almost taste it--"

"Release your inhibition!" My bedroom door bursts open as a new voice cuts in and I frown. Jason grins and waves at me from behind the video camera. My frown deepens but he only gestures for me to continue singing. After fighting down the blush I continue on with the imaginary concert inside my head.

"No one else can feel it for you, only you can let it in. No one else," I point to him and he sings the next line easily, yet still managing to hit the notes perfectly.

"Live your life with arms wide open," We continue to sing parts of the song, me jumping around like a lunatic and him grinning widely, still pointing the camera in my direction. I can't help the thought running through my head that I have the best best friend.

(Present)

"So when do you meet with Universal?" Jason wonders aloud during a commercial.

"On the third of next month," I wipe away a stray tear, trying to keep the rest from falling. I don't know why I left it on the channel that's playing My Sister's Keeper when I know it's a movie that never fails to make me cry.

Jason turns, his face shocked. "But it's the twenty ninth today!"

"Yeah,"

"So it's in five days?"

I turn to look at him as I become confused. Five days? After using my iPod to check the date I look up, feeling the shock too. My Universal audition is soon.

"It's close," Jason comments, stretching his arms out on the couch top behind us.

"Yeah," I let out a breath of air. "Really close."

"You're not nervous, are you?" He teases, tousling my hair a little.

"No," I deny, scowling in his direction before my attention is again on the television. Jason laughs but drops the subject. I notice the ad is over and the movie is playing again.

Tears fall down my face throughout the rest of the movie, and when Kate is going through her scrapbook an uncontrollable sob washes over me.

"It's just a movie," Jason says, but when I look up at him he's wiping tears out of his eyes.

"But this really happens to people," I whisper sadly, leaning my head on his shoulder. His arm falls to rest on my own shoulder and he pulls me closer.

"Yeah," He doesn't say anything more and we watch the ending of the movie in silence.

*

"Mom, do you think Universal will ask me questions?"

Mom throws me a confused glance before turning back to the washing. "What do you mean?"

"Well I don't know anything. I don't know what type of musician I aspire to be. I like all kinds of music."

"I'm sure that won't matter, love."

"What about if they don't like the way I look?"

"They'll love you. You're pretty, and you have good style."

"How about if they ask if I want any food? And all they have to offer is meat?" I begin. "How will they take the news that I'm a vegetarian? Will they think that it's bad? That I'll be a bad influence to any possible future fans?"