Remenissions (Avenged Sevenfold)

Chapter 30

Martina's POV

I woke up pretty early on this day, this wedding day, this wedding day that I had now convinced myself shouldn't happen. I woke up and my mood was bad, I was low and I could only imagine how Lana was feeling, my poor Lana.

I thought about getting my hair done, I really did, but then I thought no, why bother, why bother doing anything for Courtney, she didn't deserve my nice hair and she didn't deserve this wedding, not at all. So instead of getting my hair done, I sat at the dining room table and cried. I just cried, so many tears and every single one for them was for Lana.

Time got away from me and before I knew it, it was lunch time. I forced myself to eat, I had no appetite, every aspect of today was making me sick and I wanted to call Brian, I needed Brian, but what would I say to him? What could I say that would make this any different?

I ended up curling my hair and pulling it back, then I got begrudgingly dressed. This just wasn't right and I couldn't get that thought out of my head. I checked myself in the mirror, and yes, I looked nice, all ready for this wedding, except my eye's, my eye's couldn't hide what I was feeling and as I headed for the door I grabbed my sunglasses. I'd hide behind those.

I arrived at the church a little early, pretty much no one was here, not even the guys, so I stood in a shaded area, waiting and doing my best not to think. Brian had said it last night and he was right, Matt was a big boy and he knew what he was doing.

BUT FUCK, my mind screamed, HE'S DOING THE WRONG THING.

People started arriving and I stayed where I was, under the shade, waving hi to everyone as they headed in the church. A few lingered outside the church like me, but we all stood there, none of us talking. Maybe we all felt a little gloomy.

The guys arrived, well the guys and Lana and I couldn't help but smile as Johnny, Jimmy and Brian got out, clutching a beer.

"Guys." I called out, walking over to them. "You're at church for godsake."

"Marty." Brian cried, smirking at me. "That's blasphemy." And he pulled me into his arms and kissed me softly.

I watched Matt get out of the other car and he held out his hand, helping Lana. She got out and stood up, looking around wide eyed. Matt did not let go of her hand, he was holding it tightly.

I looked at her and she took my breath away. She looked beautiful, the dress she had on was perfect, perfect for her and her hair was curled and piled on top of her head.

"Marty." She said looking at me smiling. She took a step towards me but Matt wouldn't let her go, so I went to her instead.

"How are you feeling?" I asked her, hugging her. She could only return my hug with one arm, because still, Matt had her hand.

Suddenly Matt's mom appeared from nowhere and started lecturing Matt on being late and Lana took the opportunity to lean over and whisper in my ear.

"Marty." She whispered. "Do I look okay?"

"Oh god Lana." I told her, smiling. "You look wonderful, beautiful, perfect."

"I do?"

"You do." I said. "Didn't any of these idiots tell you that?"

She shook her head, looking down at her feet. "No." She said softly. "When I asked Matt how I looked he groaned at me and told me to go away."

Oh why was I not surprised. Yeah to Lana Matt was being mean, to me Matt was telling Lana to go away because the sight of her was confusing him, and as I watched him reach out and take Lana's hand again, I knew I was right, I had no doubt.

"You should head inside." Matt's mom announced. "The girls will be here soon."

"Well come on babe." Brian murmured, slipping his arm around my waist.

We headed towards door, everyone following and as we got closer I heard Matt say softly. "Mom, I just need a second."

"Of course sweetheart." She told him.

We reached the door and stood there, everyone else going in. I turned around and looked. Matt was standing there and he had Lana's hand, he wasn't saying anything, he was just staring into the distance.

"Marty." Brian whispered. "Come on."

"Look." I said softly. "Look at them."

"I know Marty." He groaned. "Jesus, I fucking know."

I looked at him and I wanted to cry and I tried not too as he pulled me into his arms.

"What will be will be Marty." He whispered in my ear. "Let it go baby, we can't do anything."

I nodded and he kissed me softly. "I'll see you after the ceremony." He murmured and I watched him walk to the front of the church and join the other guys.

I stood in the door to the church and I turned back to look at Matt and Lana.

They were still standing there, only now she was facing him and he was saying something to her, stroking her cheek and she was smiling sadly. Fuck, he looked sad too, he really did.

I watched him pull her into his arms and he hugged her tightly, Lana laying her head on his chest.

I looked at Lana and she had her eye's closed, but when she opened them, I saw a tear roll down her cheek.

I turned away, giving them privacy and looking at all the people in this church.

I wasn't sure how I was going to do it, and I wasn't sure how people were going to react, but I was going to stop this wedding.

There was no way that this wedding was going to happen. Not if I had anything to do with it.