Recovery (GOT7 fanfic)

Being Here Is Enough

I wanted to stay. I honestly did. 

But there was that one bad feeling inside of me that made me leave anyway. I had heard their conversation over the phone, loud and clear. I heard the urgency in Yugyeom's voice, and I could picture him freaking out about anything and everything. 

And I would have to talk to him at some point.

Truthfully, I missed him, but Jinyoung was right. Jinyoung was the one who was there for me when no one else was. I couldn't deny that.

Now I had to check up on Yugyeom and Bambam. The way he took Bambam and I in was more than kind, and the past year we had lived together, as a family, couldn't be forgotten. I almost regretted ignoring him yesterday, but I was just so.. mad. 

I walked to our apartment briskly, bumping into people by accident in my hurry. I muttered 'sorry' too many times for me to count. I searched my bag for my keys, but I couldn't find them, so I started banging on our front door. "Yugyeom! Bambamie! Open up! It's m--" 

I didn't finish my sentence, as the door flew open, and I fell  forward onto Yugyeom, who opened the door. "About time," He sighed, giving me a hug. 

I pushed myself off him, and I was shocked to see his pale complexion, dark circles standing out like bruises. I opened my mouth to say something, but I just lost the words. We just looked at each other, then hugged again. I sniffled, but I refused to cry. 

"Don't let other people pick up your phone," Yugyeom chuckled half-heartedly. 

I smiled sadly, and finally spoke up. "I'm sorry,"

"Me too," Nothing more was said about that matter. Because it didn't matter to either of us.

"So, what's so urgent?" I asked.

"I... I'm sorry.. I don't know where Bambam is," He avoided my eyes.

"What the hell do you mean? Where is he?" I frowned, raising my voice slightly, panicking.

"I don't know! He came home from school yesterday, and this morning, he wasn't here," Yugyeom rubbed his neck with his hand. He does that when he's nervous.

"Shit shit shit shit... where the fuck could he be?!" I paced around the living room. I clutched my forehead, hoping that would make me remember something. I could feel the tears threatening to leave my eyes. 

They did once I felt Yugyeom hold my shoulders. "Where have you looked?" I asked.

"School, the park, the beach, all the nearby coffee shops, and I've even phoned Jackson and some of his other friends," He checked off a list in his head.

I crouched down. My head felt so tight, like it was going to explode. My eyes searched for even one little pill, but I knew they were all gone. This breakdown was all me. "Bambamie..." I whined. He was my brother. And I'd lost him. 

"We have to go to the police," Yugyeom murmured.

"No! You know we can't. We're not adults, and they'll be wondering where his parents are. Oh, and it'll be fantastic when they find out that we ran away, ended up living with you for a year, and that I'm a depressed, insane, addict!" I screamed through my closed eyes, and helpless tears. 

"Hey, calm down. We'll find him on our own then," Yugyeom agreed to not go to the authorities, which I appreciated greatly. We didn't want to mess up our lives any more than they already are. 

We grabbed our jackets, and headed out into the streets. It was still light, but quiet nonetheless. I could see our breaths mingle in the cold air as we walked in silence for a few moments.

"If you don't mind me asking.. Where'd you two go when you first ran away? He might be there," Yugyeom stopped moving. I took a few more steps and turned to face him.

"We hopped on a train, got off once they realised we had invalid tickets, and you know where you found us," I shrugged it off, as if those harsh days meant nothing. I remembered telling him sternly that we couldn't go home, otherwise we'd keep on getting hurt. I remember him not believing me, but I convinced him, because he trusted his older sister. 

"Yeah, you were down in the alley where my bins were," He remembered too.

"Hmm," I nodded.

"You don't think he'd go back, do you?"

"Where?" I frowned.

"To your parents," He said quietly.

"No," I said simply, but I was doubting myself already. I felt sick. "Did he say anything about them to you?" I pressed the issue further, even though I should have just left it.

"No. I was just trying to think of somewhere we could look," Yugyeom said.

"It wouldn't hurt to look there though, would it?" I considered taking the train to our old home. Bad idea, but something Bambam might have done.

"It wouldn't," Yugyeom nodded. 

We were in agreement. We got on the train and stared blankly out of the windows. After about twenty minutes, it jogged and bounced to a stop. I got off first, frantically looking around the crowds hoping to see a familiar face. I was followed swiftly by Yugyeom. 

"I don't see him," I breathed. I turned back to the train.

"We haven't checked properly yet!" Yugyeom scoffed at my lack of enthusiasm. I was reluctant to stay in this place for any amount of time. He grabbed my hand. "Let's find our brother,"

I bit my lip at his words until I tasted blood in my mouth. He wasn't watching me.

The house was only a few minutes walk away. My steps became heavier as we neared it, until I completely froze. Yugyeom tugged my hand. "Come on, we're almost there!"

I just made a small, hollowing noise, and pointed lightly at a hooded figure leaning against the brick wall of our old house, who I recognised as my brother. I crossed the road, and knelt down in front of him. "Bambamie," I called softly to him.

"You shouldn't have found me. I left for a reason," He said without any strong feelings.

"I can't just leave you," I comforted him. "And you shouldn't have gone here, of all places," I chuckled a little.

"They're not here anymore. I asked around. Apparently they vanished too. Parents like children," He spat bitterly. My lungs tightened at that. I had always tried to picture my parents improving, getting better, so much so that we could go home one day. 

"Just forget about that, and come home," I pleaded. I pulled his hood down and scanned his face. It didn't look like he'd been harmed, which settled my uneasiness a bit. 

Since I got no reply, I took his hands and helped him up to his feet. Yugyeom joined us and put an arm around Bambam, rubbing his back. 

"Let's go home,"