Haven • H.S.

42. Cherish Her

Chapter 42.

"...if you're lost just look for me, you'll find me in the region of the summer stars..."

Harry.

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I was having a dream that I didn't deserve.

It was beautiful-- the sight when I opened my eyes-- but it was so very painful too. Ella was here, in this dream world. Beside me, holding my hand, offering me the most warmth and comfort I'd had in far too long. My medicine was wearing off in this dream, and it felt almost real-life like with the ache in my side and the beeping next to my head. But I knew it couldn't have been reality. Things just didn't work out for me like that. The cops and Kane were still searching. They'd be here asking a million questions in my hospital room if I was awake. Right?

Her hair was sprawled over my lap, her eyes closed from a silent sleep, and her body covering the left side of my bed. My fingers twitched in her grasp, wanting this to be real so badly I didn't care if I woke her, as long as I stayed asleep. My arm was lead as I brought it up to caress the back of her head, running my fingers through her crazy disheveled strands. My fingers caught on dirt and my eyes lowered to her clothes. They were dirty.

Was she hurt? My heartbeat picked up. Did that happen in dreams?

Wake up, I screamed to myself internally. I wanted out now. This was too raw. Why would I be punished this way?

My fingers tightened on her hair, hating that she still rose with breaths in her sleep and that she wouldn't open her eyes. I hated that she was a figment of my imagination.

I blinked hard several times. Come on, come on.

Dream Ella's head popped up beneath my hand. With wide eyes I took her in. My God, she was beautiful. My hospital monitor went off the hook, and my hands shook when I reached for her. "Ella," I mumbled. "Baby."

Ella's eyes watered but her lips widened to a grin. "Thank God." She stood up, took my face in her hands. "Thank God you're okay. I was so worried, you weren't waking up and...Jesus, Harry I'm so sorry." She was running her hands over my head, my face, inspecting me.

I frowned, taking her warm hands into mine. The movement sharpened my ache, but I couldn't focus on anything other than that this was starting to feel real, and nowhere near a nightmare.

"Are you real?" I whispered.

She stopped. "Of course, I'm real. Kane found me, and he brought me to the hospital. I escaped Niall. I--I shot him, when he... You taught me how to shoot, remember? I..."

"Shh, baby." I was finally wrapping my head around the reality that she was here. That the cops had been useless, but my roommate came through. That my heart was finally full again, and that everything else would line up after that. "Ella, I thought I'd lost you."

"You didn't," she smiled through her tears. "I'm right here."

She was. She was right here. "Christ, come here." I pulled her into me, unyielding to my wound. She fit in beside me, her head under my chin. She was perfect for me. The other half of my soul. And she was safe. I let out shaky breaths, burrowing my nose in her shoulder, aching for her comfort and finally knowing what it was like to not have it. I never wanted that again.

I kissed her cheeks, her forehead, her eyelids, her mouth. God, I kissed her mouth. Her lips were made for mine; we molded like a poem. Our kiss started soft, almost unbelieving, and turned to a fever, an ache so strong my chest hurt. My breathing went labored and our tongues met, the act so familiar and right I couldn't stop myself from touching her everywhere. Her hair, her shoulders, her waist-- I stopped abruptly, a thought seeping through.