Brandon
When I see the looks on the girls’ faces, I get nervous. I’m no wimp or anything but when a group of girls get mad at you, it’s definitely not pretty. In fact, it’s quite scary. But as I look closer, at their faces, I can see that it’s not me they’re mad at. It’s Leila. I breathe a sigh of relief as I park the car. ‘Least it’s not me who has to face the wrath of 3 angry chicks so early in the morning.
“Lila looks pretty angry. Do you want me to walk in with you?” I say, hoping she’ll say no.
“Yeah actually, that would be great.” She says a relieved smile on her face. I regret trying to be nice.
“Alright,” I say and I’m surprised to hear mild reluctance in my voice. I hope she doesn’t hear it. One look at her tells me she doesn’t.
We get out. Just as we’re headed to the school, Luther and a bunch of other guys start calling my name. I look at Leila and say that it’s probably important, though I know it isn’t. The guys and I have come up with a foul proof signal to help get us out of sticky situations. It works every time. Leila says okay and I hurry over to my saviors.
“Thanks dudes,” I say. We go a different way into the school.
“What was that all about?” Jason asks.
“Aww man, your puny brain probably won’t be able to comprehend what I’ve done to these girls. Everyone knows they hate each other but does anyone wonder what’s made this worse? Well men, you’re looking at him.” I can’t help but grin.
Luther laughs,” Dude I can totally see a cat fight! Boy, I’m gonna start packing microwave popcorn so I’ll be ready!” We all laugh.
“Yo, enough on Brandon’s latest female adventures, let’s hit the mall afterschool. We can hit on a whole bunch of random women,” Mark exclaims.
“Nah, I gotta go out with Lindsay,” Jason says almost immediately.
I shake my head, “Dude all you do is hang with Lindsay, you’ve got to play the field, my man. I’ve got twins eating out of my hands and I’m still headed to the mall tonight.”
Jason snorts and shakes his head, “No, it’s different with Lindsay, I really like her.”
I laugh, “No, you probably just really like what goes on after hours, if you know what I mean.” I bump him with my shoulder.
Jason pushes me looking disgusted,” Man, you’ve got some issues. Lindsay and I haven’t even done that stuff.”
“Damn, you’re even more out of it than I thought,” I say shaking my head again.
”Whatever dude, I’m not going. Just drop it.”
There’s an awkward silence so Luther whips out his Calculus textbook, “Hey did anyone do the calcul-“ he stops midsentence as a hot freshman passes by. Then he starts using what he calls his “sexy voice.” Except when he uses it, he sounds like Donkey from Shrek.
“Gggirrlll,” he says drawing out the word, “You be lookin’ so foiine in dem jeans. That only be makin’ you look more right for me, Lutha Cool, Lutha Fine.” He starts thrusting out his pelvis as she walks away looking horrified.
“Oh please,” she says.
Luther starts swinging his head around, snapping his fingers and pursing his lips.
“Now girl, you don’t know watchu missin’! ‘Cause Lutha ain’t just cool, he’s one hot tamale! He ain’t gon wait around fuh you gurlfriend. Unh unh! He gon’ fin’ another sweet young thang out there! Cause Lutha ain’t just Fine! Lutha Cool!”
He ends in a pose with his butt sticking out to the side and his hand on his hip. He’s still got his lips pursed. “Gurrl, you betta recognize!” he says when she shudders and runs down the empty hall.
”Yeah, so how ‘bout that calculus?” he says straightening up and returning to his regular voice. The rest of us are doubled over with laughter as the bell rings and we head to class.
