Waking Up

Packing

Chapter Thirteen

When I woke, Matt was still unpleasant. I had to make my own breakfast. "Are we really gonna move?" I asked, holding back fear and tears.

"Yea, to Lubbock, Texas," he said coldly. "I stayed up all night figuring it out. They have good schools there, don't worry. I've called moving trucks and we're set for 12 pm today."

"What about goodbyes?" I asked but he had left the room. I didn't want to move to Texas. I stormed into my room and threw a little kid tantrum. I was furious with him, myself, the fuzz, the drunken man who hurt Ponyboy.

Slowly, I began to pack my things. I didn't have a lot, but it was all I had. I went through my drawers and took out my clothes. At the bottom of it was a poem written by Delaney and the Elvis cutout. I smiled to myself bitterly. Everything I had reminded me of my Tulsa friends. How could Matt just make me leave them behind?

It was around noon and we had been packing the whole time. I guess I didn't have a chance to say goodbye. I hopped into Matt's car; in the back seat. "Goodbye Tulsa," I whispered and kissed the window. Tears ran down my face as we passed the Curtis house. Then the DX, Dairy Queen, every place I had ever visited.

I felt numb. On the inside, in my heart. I had lost everyone, now I had even lost hope.

The drive to Lubbock took forever, so the radio played. "You know, Reagan, mom and dad would be very disappointed in you," Matt said, his tone still cold. The words stung. I choked back the tears and remained quiet. The guilt of leaving my friends, without saying goodbye, ate away at me.

The whole ride I thought about how I should've been more grateful to live there. All the things I could've done while I had the chance. But it was too late, I screwed up once again. I thought about the first time I met Ponyboy and Johnny, two months ago, I had been hostile. After I had warmed up to them and we became closer than ever.

I rested my head against the window. My tears fell down the car door's interior. I shut my eyes tightly, trying to make the pain go away. Before I knew it, I was fast asleep.

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I stood in front of the Curtis house. The street was completely empty. In the house, all the lights were all on. I opened the gate to the house and walked up the steps. I knocked on the door but no one answered. Everything seemed fuzzy. I knocked once more, but again no one answered. I felt like they were ignoring me, so I opened the door.

Everyone was sitting and talking like I wasn't even there. "Hello?" I said, waving a hand in front of his face. I was still not acknowledged. Around the room, I tried to get everyone's attention, but it didn't work. "Stop ignoring me!!!" I yelled. It caught no ones attention.

The gang was talking though. "I can't believe she just left," said Steve. Ponyboy nodded.

"She was mine and Johnny's best friend. She couldn't just leave without saying goodbye. I guess she wasn't really a friend after all," he said.

"Ponyboy that is not true!" I yelled as everyone else agreed with him. Hands grabbed me by the arms and dragged me out.

"No!" I screamed and thrashed. Everything went black.

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I opened my eyes and saw the car was parked in a small driveway. Matt turned around and looked at me. "This might be the house we're getting. I called a local realtor and she should be here any minute," he told me.

"Wow," I muttered, "you stayed up really late to get all this done and figured out." Matt didn't smile or anything, he just turned back around.

The realtor pulled up behind us and showed us the house. Sure it wasn't huge, but it was doable. Nothing like our house back in Tulsa. The realtor talked with my brother about how our house in Tulsa would do on the market and about the paper work for the new house. All I could think about was the gang, Delaney, Sarah, and Jamie.

For a week, Matt and I stayed in a motel until the owner of the house agreed on a price. "I know you don't want to move but-" Matt started but I held up a hand to stop him.

"You said this the last time, but now you've taken me from the only friends I had left," I argued. Matt frowned.

"Well its because of YOUR choice of actions!" he snapped.

"I was defending A FRIEND!!!!" I shouted back.

"You should've told AN ADULT!!" he yelled.

"I couldn't!!! The guy was drunk and was hurting him badly!!!" I stuffed my face in my hands and cried.

I had only been trying to help.