The Boss [LGBT]

Chapter 6

 Mr. Jeff drove me to the showing on the tenth.

I grew up in Cornwall, New York, just fifty miles from New York City. It has a population of about 12,000 and it has beautiful landscape. I lived in a two-story house that was the most picturesque home you could imagine, on Kersey Street. My parents still live there. My mom's parents lived down the street from us, six houses down. Around the corner on Chicago my Aunt Carol and Uncle Dave lived in their house with my cousins Mike and Molly. Then if you jump two blocks over my dad's parents live in their house. Then a block over from them is where my aunt Carmen lived, with my uncle Hank and my cousins Erika, Drake, and Eileen. We all lived so close to each other and my cousins and I would always walk home from school, go to one of our relatives' houses. I had a rush of nostalgia overcome me as I looked out the window, seeing the streets I grew up on.

We pulled up to the funeral home and he parked the car.

"I could've taken the train," I told him.

"I wanted to drive you, Em," he said. He grabbed my hand and asked, "Ready to go in there?"

I nodded and we got out of the car, walking into the building. My family was there, greeting guests and talking, fake smiles on their faces. Mom came over to me and hugged me, smiling but her eyes were still watery. "Hi Emerson," she said.

"Hi Mom," I said, trying to stay calm, hugging her. "This is Lafayette Jeff, my boss."

"Oh hi," she greeted, and if we were in a different situation she'd be bewildered to meet a famous person. "It was nice of you to drive him here and to come here."

"It wasn't a problem, ma'am," he said. He put an arm around me, resting his hand on my shoulder. "Emerson is a very wonderful friend of mine, it's the least I could do."

She smiled tightly and said, "Oh well I hope you can take care of him."

"I can do that, Mrs. Lane."

She thanked him and then looked to me and said, "Have you gone up to the casket yet?"

"No, not yet Mom."

"It doesn't look like her. It really doesn't. You can go up there later, after the majority leave."

I nodded, swallowing the lump in my throat. I was in a haze the entire showing. It was surreal and different. I had never been to any type of funeral or anything. I had lost a friend before but didn't go to the funeral and blocked that out of my mind for most of my life, when I was a kid and could do that. I sat in the parlor with Mr. Jeff, my cousins occasionally coming by to sit with me and to talk with me, talking about the good memories we've had. It was insane. I thought about the times I had with Aunt Carmen and how back then, like at the 4th of July parade, none of us knew she wouldn't be here in a few months. What about in a few months? Would I not see my dad on his birthday in February? Would I not see Mom this time next year? It was something I always avoided thinking about. I'd watch TV or movies or read books and people would lose a loved one, their father or mother would pass away and the thought of that would enter my mind but I'd immediately get it out and think about something else. I hated imagining that, that my parents or loved ones wouldn't be there anymore. It was terrifying.

"You still love your parents right?" I asked him, quietly, looking out the window behind the couch we were sitting on.

"Well," he sighed. "I do. I just wish things would change. We've had good memories, but I just wish there were more of those than bad memories."