Forgetting the Murder

18: Goals

I pick up my Twilight book and flick through the pages. A girl falls in love with a vampire. It seems troublesome at first but it all works out in the end. A good story, really.

I put the book down and stand up to walk over to my bookcase, avoiding all the scrunched up tissues that lie on the floor. Most, if not all, of my books are love stories.

I'm not sure why, really. Love has always interested me. I used to think that my 'Prince Charming' will sweep me off my feet and I'll live happily ever after, but that's not how it works.

That's not how it'll ever work.

***

"Do you have any goals, Abby?" Zeke asked as we walked hand-in-hand along the shore.

We were walking on the beach in front of Zeke's house. I wanted to go here because it was officially my favourite place in the world.

Yes," I answered, "I have a lot."

"Tell me about them,"

"Well, I'd like to see the Great Wall of China and the Empire State Building, and oh! I'd love to go to India!" I said excitedly. Talking about my dreams and the possibility of them happening always makes me excited.

Zeke picked me up and swung me around. When he put me on the ground again he said, "Well then, it's now my goal to make that happen."

I kissed him lightly on the cheek. "Any other goals or dreams of yours?"

"I'd love to have a family and we'd live on a farm, with sheep and chickens."

I laughed a little, "You're full of surprises."

"You have no idea," Zeke muttered under his breath.

I ignored his comment an kept walking. It was a little chilly outside so Zeke leant me his jacket. I enjoyed the feeling of the wind against my face and Zeke's fingers intertwined in mine.

I couldn't help thinking about my mum and how I still haven't spoken to her. It's a bit childish of me really, I should've apologised a while ago but I couldn't help it. I'd promised myself that I would do it today.

"It's OK, I'm sure your Mum will forgive you," Zeke said as if he could read my mind.

I mumbled a reply then turned around to face him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him gently. "Should we hang out tonight?"

"I think we've done enough hanging out lately. You need to sort things out with your family."

I stared Zeke then pulled away grumpily, "You're no fun, Zeke Riley,"

In an attempt to get me to smile he started to tickle me. I hate being tickled. You sit there laughing your head off but really you want to slap the person tickling you. Quite frustrating, really.

I was able to scramble my way out of Zeke's grasp to give him a severe telling off.

After another half an hour or so on the beach, Zeke persuaded me to go home and make up with my family. I drove home quite slowly, wasting as much time as I could.

I took a deep breath as I stood in front of my front door. Slowly, I pressed down on the handle and pushed open the door to let myself in.

I walked into to the kitchen to find Mum scrubbing frantically at a pot.

"Hello, Mum," I said sheepishly.

My mum turned around and stared at me in shock. "Abby," she gasped.

Mum ran towards me, placed my face in between her two hands and kissed both my cheeks.

When she had finished she took my hand and asked, "Where did you go, Abby?"

"I went to Zeke's,"

My mum looked slightly disappointed, but tried to disguise it with relief that I was finally back.

"We're together now, Mum." I told her quietly.

Mum looked shocked, but she couldn't hide her disappointment anymore. "W-when did this happen?"

I blushed, "Last night,"

"I'm happy for you, darling," she lied. I knew she was lying, I'm not stupid. I apologised for what I said to her the other day and walked up to my room.

As I was sorting through my wardrobe I heard a familiar voice at my door.

"Abby?"

I looked over at her and stared at her coldly. "What, Emily?"

"What have I done wrong?" she pleaded, looking as if she was about to break down into tears.

"You know fine rightly!" I yelled. Emily closed the door so Mum and Dad couldn't hear us.

"What did I do? Please tell me!"

I walked right up to her. "What do I hate most in the world?"

"Alcohol?"

"Exactly. Because my friend died from alcohol!"

Emily looked confused. "I don't understand,"

"If you want to ruin you life because of vodka it's not my problem."

"What? I don't drink, Abby!" Emily cried.

"You lying bitch," 

I knew that was harsh, and regretted it the minute it left my mouth. But it was too late to take it back.

Emily's eyes started to water. "I don't drink, Abby. Please believe me." she begged.

I couldn't believe her. There was a part of me that wanted to believe her but the unforgiving part of me dominated that part. She had lied to me, about something she knew I couldn't stand.

"Get out,"

"Abby, please,"

"I said, get out," I stated firmly.

Emily walked out the door, her head hung in shame. I closed my door behind her, wanting some privacy.

Ever since we were young, me and Emily have been close. She has always been my best friend, the one who looked out for my when no one else did. I loved her with all my heart, but she had betrayed me.

***

You probably think I've over-reacted but think - and think hard, reader - have you ever had someone you love taken away from you? Someone who meant the world to you? For something which was easily avoidable?

Then think of how you'd feel if you had to watch someone else you love go down the same path. All you can picture is the same fate happening to them, no matter how much you've tried to stop it. How would you feel then?

Before you judge me, I want you to put yourself in my position. Imagine the hurt, the betrayal and the lies.

Not so easy to judge now, is it?

***

I lay down on my bed and let the tears flow from my eyes. I hated myself for how I spoke to Emily, but it couldn't be helped. It wasn't me making the mistakes, but I still managed to come out looking like the bad guy.

I used a pillow to smother my face and keep the tears from falling down my face. I screamed lightly into my pillow. It was so strange how my life could go from an indescribable high to a depressing low.

I felt my phone vibrate, when I checked it I saw I had a text from Zeke. It read;

"I love you."

A smile returned on my face as I typed;

"I love you too."