Chapter 7

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"Did he or did he not just say fucking high school ?" I asked Schmidt ,he nodded "fuck " I whispered . " Alright I guess what I'm trying to say embrace your fucking stereotypes ,like this one " he said pointing to Jenko " handsome and he's probably a dummy " "and then this guy he's short and insecure and he's probably good with money " I smirked "what the fuck?" Schmidt said "you are good with money " Jenko said "and Katy Perry over here with the purple curls in a ponytail ,she's creative and smart but a complete bitch when pissed of or corrected, and doesn't like being bossed around " I stared in awe " he's right you can be a bitch " Jenko said ,I stepped on his foot "thanks dummy " I said with a devilish grin " now you three didn't anybody tell you this was and undercover unit ?" he asked we looked at him "teenage the fuck up !" he said "fine " I yelled I took off the navy shirt and had a black tank top ,I let my hair down from the pony tail and messed with it " there's how that fucker !" I yelled looking up at him " I like your style Perry" "mhm thought so " . After we all changed into something more appropriate we all stood in the church listening to the captain "rule one " "don't get expelled " "rule two !" " don't have sexual relationships with the students or teachers ,and assuming you called him handsome and a dummy that rule applies to Jenko " I said sitting on the bench "you heard Katy Perry keep that dirty dick in your pants ,now you ,you and you in my office now!" I scoffed but jumped off the bench and walked into his office. "alright this is why you're here ,this video was posted " he said clicking the play button ,it showed a kid taking drugs and going berserk "hey wait I know about this " I said stopping the video they all glanced at me "enlighten me Katy Perry " I rolled my eyes but spoke " the drugs ,its a new synthetic drug called HFS ,and it gets you hammered basically " I say looking at him "well I'll be damned Perry you sure got the smarts " I rolled my eyes ,he clicks the video and Schmidt and Jenko began laughing hysterically " I could watch this kid all day " Jenko says "Too bad his parents found him in his room OD'D on HFS " Jenko and Schmidt stopped laughing "and as you can see the kid was white so people actually give a shit " he said "for the record sir I would care if the kid was black " I turned away and smirked "kiss ass " " right now its contained at Sagan High but if it gets out we're looking at it going viral within days ,now Jenko I looked at your old transcript and enrolled you in a bunch of bullshit courses like photography and drama get in with the burnouts and the cool kids find out who's slinging this shit , now Schmidt it says you were a virgin through high school " "wait it says that ?" Schmidt asked getting red " No I just assumed due to your many years in on the honor roll " what about her she was on the honor roll ?" I glared at him "yea so " I said scoffing " anyways , they're stealing equipment from the chemistry lab ,and that's probably what their using to cook that dope up ,and lastly my favorite Katy Perry " he said sarcastically smiling in my direction I signed you up in all the same as them but my gift to you is you also get yearbook " "yearbook aside from all the other bullshit courses man what the fuck did I do to you god damn? " I said looking at him " your new identities are Brad and Doug Mcquaid and you Perry your name is Nicole Harris and muscles here is your undercover boyfriend " I looked at him and stood up "the fuck hell no " "listen Perry this one is on a tight leash and he will go and sleep with half the school I just need you to take care of that for me no sexual relationships remember ?" "but ...fuck I ain't no fucking babysitter thanks a lot Jenko " I said sitting back down " the mission is infiltrate the dealers find the supplier " "wait we get to be brothers ?" Jenko asked "infiltrate the dealers find the supplier " "but if we find the supplier first we won't have to worry about the dealers " "guys god damn infiltrate the dealers find the supplier simple as that " I say getting up and walking out . I stopped by the entrance bench and noticed Jenko looking at Schmidt praying to the Korean Jesus ,we began snickering "hey ,hey stop fucking with Korean Jesus he ain't go time for your problems ,he busy with Korean shit ,now you two get to your mama's house " Schmidt ,Jenko and I walked out and drove to Schmidt's house .

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