If I Can Love You, Why Can't You? - A Werewolf Novel

If I Can Love You, Why Can't You? - Chp 25 [Here I Stand]

My hands shake 'cuz today I know you're gonna break my heart and/My life without you in it is a life that's not worth living/I'll be strong, but I wish I was someone else/Anyone but me tonight/Here I stand all alone tonight/And I wish I was strong enough to breathe/Without you in my life/I wish I was anyone but me~Madina Lake – Here I Stand

I found myself after that at a beach; it was near or after midnight, hours after I should have met my mother and brother.

Instead I was at the beach sitting on the sand on a rock, waves throwing up and around me drenching me right through to my very core. I didn’t care; I was beyond broken, beyond hurt, beyond lifeless. I had nothing in this world. I was officially on my own and that tore me to shreds. I sat on that rock for hours sitting numb, unable to move, to cry. I shivered freezing by the harsh ice whips of the waves, the salt searing at my skin. The white dresses now basically see through and my wedges and clutch somewhere deserted back there in the sand. The moon hung high up in the sky hiding behind a misty cover of eerie see through clouds, the sky starless in the big city. The salt clung to my very form and I could taste the overwhelming taste of salt on my cracked lips. My entire form rattled with uncontrollable shakes and convulsions of coldness, goosebumps all over my blue skin that was sticky from the sea water. The waves crashed against me every time harder and harder as if it was growing angrier and angrier by the minute. I knew where I sat was dangerous but I couldn’t find the strength within me to care anymore.

I could imagine I was quite a sight to see.

Gradually I stood up and turned ready to get into my Ute and drive somewhere else. Maybe I’d move to America or Europe. I always wanted to see the beautiful castles in Europe.

And there standing about five meters away, the distance extensive, stood Will. His chest heaving harshly and his breathing all lost into breathlessness, his eyes were blazing as he stared at me with such an intensity I wanted to cower or melt at his very feet. I wasn’t sure. My heart thudded one harsh lively thud against my ribcage and internally I grimaced at how harsh it was pounding, I had thought I was lifeless now. My whole entire form grew to this heated inferno that was dripping with pure need and I had no control over myself as I was brought to life. My breathing evened up and I found myself to actually take a natural breath instead of feeling choked and constricted.

“I need to hold you.” He growled his voice enough to make me melt, as if he actually wanted me, loved me. It held so much strain and emotion of depth with his growl, husky and sweet. It had me feeling weak. It was husky and terribly sexy causing my entire body aching for his touch, for him to take possession of my body.

I didn’t hesitate, I should have stopped myself, but I never.

My legs carried me to him in a sprint and my arms wrapped around his neck in a strangled hold as I let out a whimper clinging on for dear life. I soaked up his beautiful scent and drooling body warmth his touch alone leaving me breathless as the intoxicating tendrils of desire, passion and love swarmed through me as our skin connected and I was consumed with currents and crackles of electricity. And I cried. My whole body curling around him possessively, unable to get enough as Will lowered us to the sandy floor, his own hold on me possessive and tight as he practically choked me. I cried all over again everything surfacing and leaving me again but this time leaving me feeling better, hopeful. I kept my head buried in his neck bathing in his scent as if I was an alcoholic tasting alcohol after being sober for over a century. Will held me fiercely to him, every contour of ours bodies clear and our bodies melded together. His hands were buried in my drenched hair as he continued to breathe in my scent over and over again as if to testify that this was real, as if he like me had become lifeless without my scent, without me.