Conflicted

Chapter 5

Ephesians 4:32  And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.

Matthew tried not to stare at the woman standing before him. However, it was impossible not to take in her beauty. She had the clearest blue eyes he had ever seen. Her face was soft and her hand ever so gentle. However, he could tell immediately that she had so much buried inside that it was tearing her apart. Matthew started to wonder what her story was. He could tell she was good at burying her true feelings. At first glance, you could not tell that she was dealing with something. She was by far attractive, well-dressed, and appealing. However, he found himself concerned about her heart. 

Matthew was grateful as she continued to wipe the blood from the corner of his mouth. He smiled at her making Savannah annoyed again.

"I wish you had not done that. Brian always has bodyguards around and he is not someone to be messing with," she warned.

"What is your name?" Matthew asked. 

Savannah looked at him blankly wondering if he was hard of hearing. "Why? It's not like we are going to see each other again," she said staring into his brown eyes.

"I am Matthew," he said extending his hands. Savannah folded her arms already suspicious of him.

"Matthew, I am not available, not interested, and taken," she said getting ready to walk away.

"By that guy who disrespected you? I think there is more to you than you give yourself credit for," Matthew suggested.

Savannah looked at him up and down pondering what was his end game. "Okay, Matthew what do you want with me?" she asked.

"I want nothing from you. The question is what do you want for yourself?" he said.

"Men always want something in return. Do you want to hook up or something?" Savannah said boldly calling his bluff.

"No, I just want to get to know you," he continued. Savannah wanted to be pist off but something was different about Matthew. 

"Savannah," she said looking away. Her phone vibrates and her attention returns to the screen. 

"I have to go, Matthew, take care of yourself," she said walking away. 

Matthew watched her leave feeling his heart thud rapidly near to his chest. Savannah was not what he expected when he asked God for a wife. But he felt in his spirit that she was the one. 

Savannah saw the glare of anger plastered on Brian's face as she broke off the relationship and arrangement they had together. She was shocked by his reaction. Brian was married and only took the role of a sugar daddy in her life. They had no possible future together and he was ten years older than her. They just assumed the role of friends with benefits. She regretted now sleeping with him. Brian's family were rich Italians who she believed had connections with the mob and other illegal characters. The adrenaline rush of being with him was completely gone and she wanted nothing to do with his world. 

"You cannot walk away from me Savannah. You are nothing but a cheap whore," he said cruelly trying to cut her at the core. 

Savannah was void of emotions years ago after being taken advantage of. "A cheap whore you can't get enough of," she mocked walking away.

"So, the guy at the party is your new conquest. A real man will never want you," Brian continued to hurl the word curses at Savannah. 

"I don't know him," Savannah pointed out. "This should not concern you because as you pointed out no man will want me," she continued.

"Have a nice life. And get out of my apartment," Savannah ordered him. She stepped back when he came closer to her shocking her. 

"Savannah, you don't get to leave me as easily as you want," Brian said rolling up his sleeves. 

"What the hell are you going to do?" she asked trying to hold up a strong resilient face. 

Savannah was not prepared for the attack. She fought him with everything she had left inside of her and realized that all along he was a complete coward and a bully whose ego was devastated because she did not want him anymore. 

Savannah cried as blood flowed from her face and said, "God, if you are out there remember me. My life is in your hands."