Thanks To You

Chapter Thirteen(Zack)

"You talk a lot," Alex commented looking at Zack.

Zack stopped as he looked at Alex "Did I say something wrong? I didn't mean to" Zack said in a panic as Alex pulled away the embrace tears welling in his eyes slightly.

Alex barely got a chance to respond before Zack excused himself from the group and made his way to his bedroom silently.

"And it's so fucking adorable how happy you get Rambling about the things you love" Alex thought to himself watching Zack leave.

Zack sat on the edge of his bed, his mind a whirlwind of conflicting emotions. As he stared at the cracked ceiling, memories flooded back like a torrential downpour.

It was a chilly autumn evening when Zack first met Chelsea. She had an undeniable allure, her laughter tinkling like wind chimes in the breeze. But behind her sparkling eyes lay a darkness Zack couldn't have foreseen.

Their relationship started innocently enough, filled with laughter and late-night conversations. But as time went on, Chelsea's demeanour shifted. It began with subtle jabs at Zack's quirks—his tendency to fidget, his need for order. At first, he brushed it off as playful teasing, but it soon escalated into something much more insidious.

Chelsea weaponized Zack's ADHD and OCD against him, using his diagnoses as ammunition in their arguments. She belittled him, accusing him of being lazy and incompetent because of his difficulty focusing or his need for things to be just so. Each criticism cut deeper than the last, leaving Zack feeling inadequate and ashamed, she'd say things like

"You can't do anything right!"
"I told you to wash up!"
"That's not an excuse!"
"You're the problem!"
"I bet you don't have ADHD you just fake it to get high!"
"All you do is cry and shake! get a grip this is real life!"

As the insults rained down on Zack, he felt like he was drowning in a sea of despair. Chelsea's words echoed in his mind, chipping away at his already fragile self-esteem. "You can't do anything right," she would sneer, her voice dripping with contempt. "I told you to wash up," she'd bark, her tone filled with frustration. "That's not an excuse," she'd snap, dismissing his struggles as mere laziness.

But perhaps the most painful of all was her accusations that he was faking his ADHD and OCD for attention or to indulge in illicit substances. "I bet you don't have ADHD; you just fake it to get high," she'd scoff, disregarding the very real challenges Zack faced every day. And when his anxiety flared up, causing him to cry and tremble, she'd mock him, telling him to "get a grip" and reminding him that "this is real life."

Each barb sunk deeper into Zack's psyche, reinforcing the toxic belief that he was inherently flawed and unworthy of love. Despite his best efforts to prove himself, he felt like he was constantly falling short in Chelsea's eyes. And yet, the thought of leaving her filled him with a crippling fear of loneliness and abandonment.

But it wasn't just the verbal abuse that wore him down. Chelsea's manipulation knew no bounds. She would withhold affection, using it as a punishment for Zack's perceived shortcomings. And when he tried to assert himself or stand up for himself, she would twist his words, making him doubt his reality.