The Rejected Alpha

2.

LUCILLE

Time never seems to be on your side when you need it the most. Especially when it comes to trying to make amends with somebody you fell in love with a long time ago and have not stopped loving.

Then there are always those sayings to keep you company in between such as 'time heals everything,' along with words such as 'fate' and 'destiny.' or there is always my favorite, 'if it's meant to be it'll be.' I'm not entirely sure who made those up but I feel whoever did, had things work out for them in the end the way they wanted it to.

There is not a day that goes by where I don't regret what I did when I was fifteen.

Deep down inside I am hoping that both Thorin and I could possibly reconcile or if anything, at least can become friends and he would be able to forgive me.

I don't know. Maybe this could turn out to be another regret to add onto the list.  Although, on the other hand, I know for sure if I don't do this, then I will one hundred percent beat myself up for it for the rest of my life.

My best friend, Kaylie, is coming with me. She has been my best friend since I could remember and because she had not come from a great family anyways, it was easier for her to runaway with me and be considered a rogue as well.

She is very much like a sister to me and has always defended me as well as help me stay in line and hold me accountable. Between the both of us and all we have had to endure, we have been very lucky in life and have grown with one another.

"You almost ready?" Kaylie asks me as she steps inside my room.

"Yeah." I take in a deep breath then let it out.

"We don't have to do this, you know. It's not too late to change your mind." She states as she takes a seat on the edge of the bed, looking at me.

"I know. But as I told you earlier, I just can't go on without telling him the truth. Even if by some tiny chance there is the possibility of us being friends or..." I hesitated to say something I was fearful of stating and getting my hopes up.

I hear her let out a loud sigh.

"You know I love you and support you. But you do know there is a chance the Moon Goddess has found him...." She stopped herself.

"I know. I would at least want to try and use being friends again, of that were the case. Either way, he needs to know the truth and what had happened and I know deep down inside that I can't afford to have any regrets." I explain. "Besides, you and I both know the number one reason as to why we are returning."

"I do. And besides, if anything, we can still have a little fun and it would be very amusing to see the people's faces."
Kaylie smirks.

"Very much so." I agreed as we shared a chuckle.

We next began to head towards our destination, in which took us several days to arrive at - a rundown looking  cabin we had rented and was located deep in the woods. Once we arrived and settled in a bit, we realized we both were exhausted from the trip and decided to rest.

The next couple of days we had grabbed some groceries and tried coming up with a plan for how we would approach things we wanted to accomplish, including if course, us seeing Thorin.

I started becoming a little bit nervous the more I thought about him. What would I say? How would I react? How would I feel? Could I tell him what had happened? Does he still feel the same about me or is he still too hurt that he would not want to hear me out?

I had to quickly calm myself down from those intrusive type of thoughts. Obviously those were not going to help. Besides, this is not something that needs overthinking.

Something that happened later on tonight as both Kaylie and I were playing some cards at the cabin, was that we both felt the anxiety we both felt  as we had decided earlier to go tomorrow and seeing the council, requesting to speak with them.

The uncertainty is what I know we both are feeling a bit nervous about and yet here we sit, playing cards on the most awkward kind of silence that we have ever shared between one another.

We next both decided to stop playing cards and decided to let our wolves go out for a run.

We ran for a very long time with nothing but the trees, nice breeze and moonlight.

Eventually, we both stopped to catch our breaths and rest for a bit before heading back when I noticed something out the corner of my eye.

I slowly walked closer towards one of the trees and the moment I realized what it was, I felt my heart drop to the pit of my stomach.

"What is it?" I heard Kylie ask me through mindlink as she snow stood beside me looking at the tree as well.

"It's mine and Thorin's initials. We decided one day to be corny and carve our names into the tree we sat at a lot." I replied when I noticed three claw marks slashed across it.

My wolf began to cry.

"It's alright." She tries to comfort me.

"No, it's not. I should have stayed and told him at least. I should have stayed behind to tell him why I had to leave. I hurt him so badly." I broke down.

"Stop it! None of this is your fault! Your parents should have....the council should have...." She struggled to finish but were immediately cut off the moment we heard somebody coming.

We hurried and ran off, not realizing where we were at exactly, but eventually after remembering and returning back to the cabin, when we went to bed, before I fell asleep, I suddenly remembered, we had just trespassed upon Thorin's property. Of course it had not occured to me in how ose we were at the time but now I realized we were not as far away from his home. Hopefully the person was not close enough to pick up our scents.

Next chapter will be posted soon! :)