Have you ever felt like something is running out of your hand despite you closing your fist?
Shubman and Ishan both felt it, first Ishan was being in this all trolling now target is shifted to Shubman, a sigh left his lips reading all the highlights in news, him being compared to others, they called him prince, the generational talent and now called Overrated , media hyped up.
His phone rang in the dim lighted room, he accepted the call seeing it is coach "Hello Sir.." his voice void of any energy.
"Shubman.. I called to tell you , Virat is back and we have decided to give you rest.. from third test match" He cut the call.
"Giving rest to me.. yeah I get it.." and just like this a tear escaped in the now dark room, "fucking liers" his head turned to again ringing phone.
"Didi.."
"Shubman they have taken back the adds and all.." He hummed , his head hurting , he ended the call without replying .
His head bounced on the bed and soon more and more tears flow out, little sobs escaping from his lips.
"can you tell me Shubman Gill's room no.?" Yashashvi saw Ishan talking to the recepstinist , he walked over to the boy.
"Ishan bhaiya.. aap yha?" Ishan looked at the boy , with whom his best friend is being compared but it is not his fault .
"ashvi Where is Shubman?" he asked hugging back the boy , who was expecting congratulation for scoring 179 but it's okay Ishan always forget anything else infront of Shubman .
"come bhaiya I will take you to him.." Ishan followed the boy and found himself standing outside a door "he is inside bhaiya did not came for dinner too.." the boy was worried .
"hmm you rest I will check on him.." Yashashvi walked away but he turned to look back when Ishan called him "you played great champ.. " a smile adorned both of their lips.
Ishan stepped inside , it was all dark "Shubi.. Shubi.." he whispered switching lights on and his heart clenched at the sight infront of him.
Shubman was lying on the bed, his body shaking , it felt like he was trying to make himself small same as Ishan was doing during South Africa Tour.
He quickly run to other and his heart broke when Shubman looked up at him , eyes red and fear , insecurities present in them, most was self doubt Ishan was not stranger to these feelings.
"oh shubi.." he sat on the bed and other hid his head in his tummy, crying his heart out now, Shubman's cries heard in the room, Ishan combed other's locks by his fingers "ish.. ishu.. I am a failure .. they are right.. "
"no shubi.. you are not a failure.. look at me baby.." he cupped other's cheeks , wiping the tears "who said it? don't believe in any bullshit.. they are just looking for a chance to hurt you.."
Ishan kissed other's eyes "you are the prince, they love you Shubi.."
"no Ishu , they love the idea of mine not me.. " Ishan's tears came out , he has never seen Shubman this much broken, there were days when they both went to bed with these negative thoughts but not this bad.
"first you now me.. I am not able to score runs .. what should I do Ishan? they did the right thing by replacing me .." Shubman said , his hands shaking , it was not right, he was already feeling stressed for his position as opener , he do not hate or even dislike anyone but it was his position and he was comfortable in it.
"Everything is falling apart Ishan"
"are you stupid? you are scoring okay I agree not big ones but little good innnigs you are playing .. what are you saying you scored more than Shreyas, Rohit bhai today and many more times you were good, so what if not able to score for sometime.."
Ishan pulled other apart from the hug, making their eyes met "and who don't love you in all, they don't love you at all" Shubman hugged him "I love you Ishan.. love you soo much.."
They both laid down on the bed , Shubman wanted to be babied tonight so that's what Ishan is doing, time to time kissing his face, head, cuddling close , Shubman's head was in his chest, their legs tangled.
"they took the deals away.."
"hmm"
"Virat bhai is coming and they are replacing me.. are we both going to end being fill ups Ishu?" ouch this was so touchy, Ishan knew it , Shubman used to cry in his arms saying how politics is going for not giving Ishan proper chances.
"I don't know about me , but I will make sure they don't make you their next victim.." Ishan whispered his eyes looking up in the ceiling.
"and I will make sure they take you back as permanent no more as a fill up .. I will fight for you baby.." Shubman whispered kissing his clothed chest.
May be Shubman scoring less, or Yashashvi being good as opener has nothing to do with his position or replacement, may be it's deep inside politics to weaken his support for Ishan, to scare him off.
"Ishu will you be with me always, for forever?"
"is this even a thing to ask.. where will I go without you!"
Shubman move upward, and make their lips met in a sweet loving kiss, throwing all the insecurities out , as his baby said "who don't support you in all, they don't love you at all".
"no matter what anyone says, I will prove myself again with my comeback, we both will fuck this toxic world and these toxic haters or fans .. " these thoughts were his lasts before drifting to the dream land where he spent a peaceful life with his beautiful lover.
Shubman felt his world being secure with his lover, all the things falling apart now coming at their respective places.
the saying goes on "jab raat ke andhere me mehnat ki to koi na tha aur jab suraj chamka to sb saath khade the "
(autor ki apni khawate hai ye )
------------------------------------Ocean_215-----------------------------------------------------------------------------Thank you for reading it.
Can we please stop comparing Shubman , Ishan or anyone , as every one is a person of their own, not even twins have same fingerprints or same thoughts, it's not like a person never face the downtime and hardships in their life, my life is not that of like a sports person and I also have so much hardships so they have their own, why this much fucking toxicity.
