You and I

CHAPTER 6

MANIK

"Where's Abhi?" Aryaman asked as he sat down on our table in the canteen.

"Haven't seen him. Probably with his good-looking cousin of his," I replied, trying to act as if I hadn't had her in my arms while her kiss shocked the hell out of me. Damn, that kiss had been sweet. I'd laid in bed that night thinking about how she'd felt. For that one moment, I was able to forget, forget about my problems, the pain, the fear, everything. All I felt in that moment was her and our kiss.

But then she'd made a small whimper which brought reality crashing down on me. The way I behaved with her was brutal. She couldn't speak and there I was caging her against the tree and using her to forget my problems. She didn't deserve that.

I needed to get away from her, so I let her go and walked off, even if it took everything that I had in me to walk away that moment. That kiss was something special. I hadn't felt that way ever. It didn't feel like a simple kiss, it felt more. But I also knew that I couldn't pull her in my darkness, can't destroy her. So, I walked away.

Not to mention if Abhi found out I'd kissed his cousin, he'd beat the shit out of me. I also knew I deserved it. She was too sweet for me, I didn't deserve her.

"She really can't talk. I was in second period with her," said Dhruv. Dhruv did our schooling with us, he was one year junior to us. Since he was a great player, all of us had asked coach to give him a position in the team. He saw a few videos of him, and yes, he's in the team now, even though today is his first day in college. "I figure, if a girl can look like that and doesn't bitch, then she might just be perfect."

Aryaman, who was sitting down at the table, jumped in. "Don't be an ass. She's Abhi's cousin." He sounded pissed. I'd seen the way he was looking at her this morning in the hall. He'd been taken with her real fast. And if I was honest with myself, I didn't like it, I didn't like it at all.

"I'm being serious. She's gorgeous and can't talk. Does it get better than that?" Dhruv asked.

I wasn't going to say anything. As frustrating as Soha can be, I didn't wish a life of being mute on anyone. I knew Dhruv was joking, but it was too cold. He wasn't thinking about what he was saying.

"She was at the field party Friday night. Abhi made it clear she was off mentally and not someone he wanted any of us moving in on," Vihaan added to the conversation as he sat down across Aryaman. "She's not just mute, but like her mind isn't right."

Aryaman studied Vihaan for a minute as if he didn't agree with him. "She didn't seem off."

I agreed with him. Nandini wasn't off in the head. That much I knew. Abhi was making that shit up. The girl was intelligent - her eyes were enough to prove that. There had been anger and disappointment in them when she had glared at me in the hallway. She had seen me at my worst, and I had wanted her to. After that kiss, I wanted her to steer clear of me. I wasn't the guy who got close to someone who was sweet.

Yes, seeing her at the party had sent a jolt of relief through me. But I'd let it register for only a moment before putting an end to it. Right now, I couldn't deal with anything but my family. Last night, as I'd listened to Mom crying softly in the living room, I knew I didn't have it in me to be nice to any girl. Not even a girl like her, who was good through and through. You could see that in her eyes every time you looked at them.

Vihaan rolled his eyes. "You know this because what? You looked at her? Sure, she's nice to look at, but if she's not right in her mind, then it's screwed up to move in on her." "Whatever, can we talk about something more interesting now?" Cabir grumbled from the end of the table.

I didn't add to the conversation because I knew better, but also because I knew her. It had been like she had seen through me. Seen my thought. And she understood. But she also expected more from me. That had been hard to swallow. For some crazy reason, I didn't want to let her down. When she saw me with disappointment in her eyes, it was almost like I got a punch in my gut. She affected me the way no one ever did. But at the same time, I wanted her to hate me enough so that she never came near me again.